Rasslin' Riot

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, ep. 20: The worst episode ever?

2011-12-11T18:35:00.000+11:00

IT'S awards night on WWCBD? and hosts Dann Lennard and Mark Williamson (joined by special guest "Nasty" Nick Galea) announce the 2011 Wrestler of the Year and, more importantly, 2011 Fuckwit Shit Kent of the Year. Who will take out these prestigious honours? How many swearwords will be used? How many local scenesters will be insulted? How much poor editing will be done to make this podcast salvageable? Featuring guest appearances from "The Pinnacle" Matt Bailey, The Sarge and retiring wrestling legend Mason Childs.
Running time: 1hr 34min
http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/webpage/what-would-chris-benoit-do-ep-20-the-worst-episode-ever-

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, ep. 19: "Scene sickness!"

2011-10-16T23:56:00.000+11:00

WE'RE baaaaaaaaaaack! In a wide-ranging podcast, Dann Lennard and co-host Mark Williamson discuss various subjects including:
Why Dann is the most HATED man in Australian wrestling...how WWE is kinda shit right now...the local scene gone mad...veterans like Jungle Cat and Skyhawk talking crap online and why they do themselves no favours acting this way...Dann calls out Jungle Cat (ooooooooh!)...the idiocy of AV Dangerously from PWA Queensland allowing 15-year-olds to wrestle for his promotion (let alone promoting weedy Jeff Hardy wannabes like Sebastian Maximus on their official web site)...we laugh uproariously at the continued antics of "Triple D" Damien Drake and his "semi-national" promotion WWX (including their recent "takeover" of PWAQ)...and much more.
Then...because we're NOT negative ninnies, we discuss some very positive aspects of Aussie wrestling including SWA's upcoming show at Cardiff Panthers, Newcastle Pro Wrestling's debut show on the weekend, AWF's recent card in Parramatta, etc.
Finally, we discuss the benefits of having veterans working on your shows - not pretend veterans like Jungle Cat and Skyhawk, but legit blokes like George Julio in Melbourne and Lofty Pickford in Sydney.
After many anecdotes and hilarious banter, we wrap the show up with a song, a little ditty I've dedicated to the various people in wrestling who've annoyed me in the past month. The song's a bit long, but you'll get the idea in the first minute what I'm trying to say. Enjoy.
Running time: 1hr 20min. (approx.)
http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-ep-19-scene-sickness-

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, episode 18: "Bah Gawd! It's the King!"

2011-09-13T21:58:00.000+10:00

IT'S a true meeting of the minds when the King of Porn DANN LENNARD and the King of Scotch MARK WILLIAMSON meet up with the King of Wrestling BIG HUSS in the heart of sunny Melbourne!
Yes, it's the infamous PODCAST OF DOOM - courtesy of the Poor Horsemen's "Bah Gawd!" Whirlwind Trip to Melbourne - performed in front of a live (partly comatose) audience in our swanky apartment overlooking Crown Casino.
Highlights of this tight yet sloppy podcast include...
* A review of the amazing WrestleRock event we attended the previous night. Who did we meet? Who avoided us? What did Mrs Jenkins do to Dann Lennard? What did Dann Lennard do to Mrs Jenkins? Is it possible to out-grub Adam Gambino? They did it! Plus we review the incredible moment when Huss ascended to the pinnacle of the scene
* Now that he is royalty, Big Huss magnanimously "apologises" to three people: AJ Maggot, Benny English and Ryan Eagles, AND
* We talk about the recent shenanigans surrounding PWA/PWWA. For a group that has the word "Professional" in their title, there are times when you just have to shake your head and wonder...
Needless to say, it's our most controversial podcast EVAH (and EVAH and EVAH...).
Enjoy and never forget, "GO GET HIM, TOOOOOOO-NEEEY!"
http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-18-bah-gawd-it-s-the-king-
Running time: 38 minutes (and this time it's a SHOOT, bruthaaaaaaaaaa!)

What Would Chris Benoit Do, episode 17: "Huss!"

2011-08-28T21:31:00.000+10:00

THE time has finally arrived. It's an exclusive interview with the controversial Internet heat magnet HUSS! Enjoy 30 minutes of verbal mayhem as Dann chats one-on-one with the big unit!
Elsewhere, Dann and co-host Mark Williamson review AWF Psychotic Slam 2011 (featuring Dick Togo and the already legendary Concrete Davidson)...we discuss the latest brouhaha surrounding SWA in Newcastle...we deal with the annoying Damien Drake...and we offer PWA in Sydney some positive advice. All this and more in the most outrageous episode yet of Australia's leading wrestling podcast.
Running time: 50 minutes (give or take a minute)
http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-17-huss-

Nixxon and Aurora beat up Sara Jay (UWA, c. 2007)

2011-08-15T17:21:00.000+10:00

DANN’S ALL-TIME AUSSIE TOP 100

2011-08-15T17:19:00.002+10:00

(That I’ve seen live from 1986-2011)

* In no real particular order (although the top 10 is pretty obvious looking at their body of work over the past 10-15 years)

** Apologies to any obvious omissions. It’s either ‘cos I have a bad memory or – in Jay Andrews’ case – I’m pretty certain I’ve never seen you live

1. Jag

2. Mikey Broderick

3. Sean O’Shea

4. Shane Haste

5. TNT

6. Mark Mercedes

7. Esteban Molina

8. Lobo

9. Scarecrow

10. Krackerjak

11. Robbie Eagles

12. Ryan Eagles

13. Rob Matrix

14. Ahmed Iblis

15. Mark Davis

16. Damien Slater

17. Mason Childs

18. Slex

19. Havok

20. Champagne Pyro/Dowie James

21. Madison Eagles

22. Lofty/Punisher Pickford

23. Justin Cross

24. Jass

25. Jason Helton

26. Jorge Del Hommos

27. MH Cydell

28. Dean Draven

29. Salem

30. Devlin DeSkyes

31. Mikey Lord

32. Alex Rudka

33. Mad Dog

34. Spike Steele

35. Cletus

36. Lee Starr

37. Steve Frost

38. Steve O’Neal

39. Mike Burr

40. Bishop Sommers

41. Bluey Bonza

42. Jaguar Kid

43. Kasey Jackson

44. Obie Cartel

45. Johnny Lukas

46. Johnny Gunn

47. Tyson Gibbs

48. Jayson Cooper

49. Kellie Skater

50. Gene Kelly

51. Carlo Cannon

52. Greg Stekker

53. Stephen Swann

54. Seoul

55. AJ Istria

56. Billy Cole

57. Will Phoenix

58. Ash Riot

59. Thug Thomas

60. Kijimuna/ Dingo Cannon/Bryan Cannon

61. Ryan Rollins

62. Mat Diamond

63. CRSM

64. John E. Radic

65. Kid Dynamite

66. BJ Blade

67. Cruz

68. Aurora

69. Blakestone

70. Mikey Nicholls

71. Jessie McKay

72. Cremator

73. Dementor

74. The Sarge

75. Blade Runner (Melbourne)

76. Psycho Kid Thunder

77. The Captain

78. Ricky Diamond

79. Mike Valuable

80. Kyle Semenoff

81. Sean Kustom

82. Mick Moretti

83. Jumping Josh

84. First Mate William Kidd

85. TJ Haze

86. Il Cognito

87. Adam Lord

88. Chucky Chaos

89. Cobra

90. Adam Bruiser/Rancid

91. Hardcore Superstar John Howarth

92. Ace Fenton

93. AJ Freely (Kiwi, I know, but he did his best work over here)

94. Amy Action

95. Powerhouse Theo

96. Crofty

97. Savannah Summers

98. Kathryn Nixxon

99. Pablo The Spanish Bull

100. Matt Bailey

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, episode 16: "Togo...never made it to Darwin"

2011-08-06T23:07:00.000+10:00

IN WHICH I recover from a post-show hangover and discuss PWA Australia's most recent card, featuring the awesome Dick Togo from Japan.

Running time: 15min10sec
http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-16-togo-never-made-it-to-darwin-

DOWN AND OUT WITH CHRIS COLT

2011-07-23T14:56:00.000+10:00

THIS ARTICLE FIRST APPEARED IN "BETTY PAGINATED" #31:

By Dann Lennard

CHARLES HARRIS – aka Chris Colt (his best-known moniker), Paul Dupree, Chuck Dupree, Maurice Chevier, Chuck Harris, Jim Dillinger, American Dream Machine, Don Juan the Magnificent, The American Dream and Chris Von Colt – was born in Idaho in the mid-1940s.

In 2007’s The Pro Wrestling Hall Of Fame: The Heels, authors Greg Oliver and Steven Johnson state the youngster moved to Oregon and got interested in wrestling. He entered the business at 18 in Massachusetts as “Magnificent” Maurice Chevier.

Openly gay in an era that frowned upon that lifestyle, Charles eventually hooked up with the older “Golden Boy” Ron Dupree and the couple soon formed a solid heel tag team known as the Hells Angels and, later, the Comancharos.

As blood-spilling, brawling, cheating bad guys – mainly working in Arizona – they held a ton of belts and feuded with top names like Cowboy Bob Ellis and Luis Martinez.

Local historian Dale Pierce told Wrestling Then And Now, “The Comancharos singlehandedly got wrestling kicked off Channel 5 in Phoenix when they figured they’d get a lot of heat by burning an American flag on TV. It got them heat all right and got them kicked off the air, but they sold out the arena that Friday.

Ron suffered a heart attack in the early 70s and became Paul’s manager. Oliver and Johnson state the younger team member renamed himself Chris Colt “in a nod to the title of his favourite gay men’s magazine”.

Ron died from a heart attack in 1975 doing ring announcing in Tacoma, Washington, aged 40.

Pierce maintains Ron’s death was the catalyst that caused Colt’s downward spiral into depression and drug abuse, but Oliver and Johnson disagree: “As a single, Colt continued to shine, in large part because of his willingness to defy the norms. He was one of the first wrestlers to adopt a rock’n’roll gimmick, painting his face and using Alice Cooper’s Welcome To My Nightmare entrance music as part of “The Chris Colt Experience” in the mid-1970s.

He was a bumping machine as Johnny Valiant – who worked with him in Ontario in 1982 – attests: “He told me, ‘Johnny, you can’t give me enough bumps. I can take these bumps all night.’ I’d give him a lot of backdrops and bumps and slams and throw him over the top rope. He just told me to keep doing it to him, that he could take it all.”

Colt was open but low-key about his homosexuality among his co-workers. But there was nothing understated about his other vices.

Arizona worker Bill Anderson remembers Chris drinking a carton of beer and a bottle of Southern Comfort every day.

“He idolised Janis Joplin…and Joe Cocker,” he told Oliver and Johnson. “Those were his people. He lived every day like this could be his last. He would’ve been the happiest guy on Earth to choke on his vomit just like Janis did, because that’s the way he lived his life.”

Anderson recalled an incident in 1975 in Phoenix when Chris hallucinated during a cage match: “He’d taken some kind of junk. He got in the cage and thought he saw some giant spiders. It was just like he was envisioning giant spiders climbing in the cage at him. He was flipping out. He started a riot. I was swinging chairs to get out.”

Northwest wrestler Greg Lake said, “Chris was always high. He used to say, ‘I can’t work if I’m not high.’ One time he was sober and said, ‘Greg, I just can’t work right when I’m sober.’ He was just a crazy, wacko guy. But as crazy as he was, he was a nice guy.”

With so many personal issues, Colt never settled down and travelled the territories well into the mid-80s.

Pierce alleges a brief run in the UK was aborted due to his substance abuse. He was fired from a northwest promotion allegedly after his photo appeared in a local newspaper covering a gay rights parade.

The big bumps and hard living had caught up with him by 1986 when he hit Alabama as neo-Nazi “Chris Von Colt”. Wrestling expert Karl Stern recalls the once-talented worker was terrible by this stage.

He quit wrestling and wound up in hard-core gay porn by the late 80s. You can still find several of his titles for sale online including Sex Aggression: Jack Husky’s First Night At Chris Colt’s Wrestling Academy, Uncut 8-Inch Pro-Wrestler Jo and The Selection 1.

One fan recalls the X-rated actor as "hot".

Oliver and Johnson state Colt began contacting old friends in the early 90s, talked wistfully about wrestling, then disappeared once more, possibly settling in Seattle, Washington.

It’s believed he became a born-again Christian and died of AIDS in 1996.

What lives on is Colt’s legacy as an underrated worker.

“Chris Colt was probably the greatest wrestler that never made it,” said Lanny Poffo, his tag team partner in Detroit in 1976. “A lot of people don’t know who he was. He never ceased to amaze me with his imagination in the ring. He was an innovator. He was ahead of his time.”

Another tag team partner, Ed “Moondog” Moretti, added, “I can honestly say he was one of the greatest workers I’ve ever seen. I’d rank him right up there with Ray Stevens and Pat Patterson. Politics, paranoia and just Chris being Chris kept him from the big, big money. But they could not keep him from greatness.”

Here's a coupla YouTube links for ya. Firstly, it's Jackie and Roughhouse Fargo vs Colt & Bill Dundee in Memphis, c. 1975:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AtX2LTpczo

Secondly, here's Colt vs a young "Tommy" Zenk from Pacific Northwest. It appears to be mid-80s. Appropriately, the dude who posted it focused on the homoeroticism of it all:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KAA_-1d9nd0

‘Chris was bizarre. He was just sex, drugs and rock’n’roll 24/7, and that was him. But when he hit that ring, oh man, it was magic’ – Ed “Moondog” Moretti

WHAT WOULD CHRIS BENOIT DO?, episode 15: In drunken defence of Gambino

2011-07-03T13:37:00.000+10:00

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-15-in-drunken-defence-of-gambino

Or is it episode 14 part 2? In this scotch-fuelled, controversial episode, we give several shout-outs to Niki Nitro and wonder whether it’s worthwhile attending a CWA show in Sydney to see her in the flesh.

We laugh at Antonio D’eath’s family photos, we discuss promotions having problems with heckling fans (with a few words of wisdom directed at PWA in Sydney).

We discuss the...ahem, impact of TNA returning to Aussie TV.

We discuss who’s better: Niki Nitro or Sara Jay. We deliver a Sara Jay bombshell!

Next, Dubbs discusses recent problems in SWA in Newcastle and why several wrestlers walked out of the promotion. We also compare SWA and PWA on a business level.

And then we get to the meat of this podcast: the appalling treatment of Aussie wrestling legend ADAM GAMBINO by the ungrateful hacks at the DCW Variety Hour. We talk to Adam exclusively as he drops bombshell after bombshell about the Mr Criss Fresh and his lackeys.

We then make a controversial offer to Adam to leave the Variety Hour and join the What Would Chris Benoit Do? team. Will he accept? Find out!

After Gambino hangs up, we discuss Australasian wrestlers having a tryout with WWE. How did Kyote and Huss go?

And, in a shocking moment, Dann Lennard says something that rarely comes from his lips. How will Huss respond to this truth bomb?

We wrap the show up in nostalgic fashion, discussing one of the most controversial incidents in Aussie wrestling history: the riot at Bronte RSL from a few years back. Dann was in the audience. Dubbs was backstage drinking poison. Our memories may differ slightly on details, but we still manage to fondly reminisce about this unforgettable event.

All in all, it’s the most controversial, bridge-burning episode EVER of the world’s No. 1 wrestling podcast. It’s 90 minutes of lighthearted mayhem. WHAM! Can your heart stand it?!!

What Would Chris Benoit Do, episode 14: They call me Bruce...Hart

2011-07-03T12:10:00.000+10:00

IN WHICH me and co-host Mark Williamson discuss Friday night's WWE house show in Sydney: who rocked, who sucked and why R-Truth is NOT main event material.
We analyse the AWF's upcoming iPPV and discuss Dubbs's experience attending that show live a few weeks back.
We reminisce about Rohan Herbstreit's run as the boss of wrestling.net.au. How he wronged us and why we don't hold a grudge.
We commemorate the fourth anniversary of Chris Benoit's death. Was he really that bad? (Um...yes)
Dann eviscerates the shitty new autobiography by Bruce Hart (above).
And there's a shout-out to both Jason Helton and Niki Nitro (below).
All this and more makes up part one of a controversial two-part podcast.
Running time: 57:30
http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-14-they-call-me-bruce-hart

HART ATTACK – a review of Bruce Hart’s new autobiography

2011-06-25T11:34:00.001+10:00

I DON’T want to say that Bruce Hart’s new book, Straight From The Hart, is the worst wrestling autobiography I’ve ever read. But I’ll be damned if I can think of a more badly written, shoddily researched, outrageously subjective memoir put out by a grunt’n’groaner.

Normally, I’m full of praise for ECW Press’s releases, but not this poor effort, and I’m not even talking about the numerous factual errors and timeline snafus. I guess you could put that down to Bruce’s poor memory and the publisher’s unwillingness to call him on his mistakes.

Sure, the author’s constant big-noting of himself – as a wrestler and a booker – is obnoxious. However, I can understand a worker’s need to make his career seem greater than it really was.

Truthfully, Bruce was a minor player in the world of pro wrestling. His only claim to fame is that he was a member of the infamous Hart clan and part of the small-but-influential Stampede territory for so many years.

But not according to Bruce, who – in his own eyes – was one of the most influential men in wrestling history. After all, he introduced entrance music to North America; the vicious babyface personas that Bruce developed for his Stampede tag team Bad Company (with Brian Pillman) inspired Steve Austin’s “Stone Cold” gimmick; Bad Company’s outfits inspired the Hart Foundation’s ring outfits; Bruce invented the sharpshooter finishing hold, then gave it to Bret to use. And so on. Yep, the bullshit claims are laughably absurd at times.

The author’s self-pity is also understandable – clearly, Bruce feels he was robbed of his deserved place in wrestling history – and a ton of money. According to this book, time after time, a cruel twist of fate cost him the chance to make it in the big-time (read “WWF”). And if it wasn’t fate denying him his spot in the limelight, it was his younger brother, Bret “The Hitman” Hart.

Ahhhh, Bret. Settling old scores is another given in a wrestling memoir and Bruce certainly doesn’t hold back, especially on the Hitman. In his foreword, Bruce writes, “While I won’t be pulling any punches…I won’t be taking cheap shots either.” Ha! He immediately thanks everyone under the sun…except brother Bret. And it only gets worse from there.

Bruce’s desire to pour shit on the Hitman on nearly every page overwhelms everything else in the book. Whatever screwed up Bruce’s life is somehow connected to Bret, either through indifference, selfishness or downright vindictiveness on the Hitman’s part. Any event that can be manipulated into making the Hitman look his absolute worse is grabbed by Bruce with both hands.

You can feel the hatred oozing from every page. While the brothers clearly had issues for many years, it worsened when Bret and Bruce wound up on opposite sides in Martha Hart’s lawsuit against the WWE over husband Owen’s tragic death in 1999. The lawsuit tore the family apart and, clearly, the wounds are still raw.

This autobiography appears to be Bruce’s chance to “get even” with his younger, more famous, more successful brother.

So how has Bret mistreated Bruce over the decades? Let him count the ways:

* When Bret helped book Stampede, he derailed both the promotion and Bruce’s wrestling career

* Bret employed Bruce to ghost-write the Hitman’s syndicated weekly wrestling column in the early 90s, then unceremoniously sacked him years later, AND

* Bret vetoed several opportunities for Bruce to get work in WWE including an alleged resurrection of the Bad Company tag team with Pillman in 1997 (even though Bruce was, by this stage, a 46-year-old undersized part-time wrestler).

It all leads up to Bret’s stroke in 2002. This is Bruce’s take on what happened next: “It was pretty sobering to see him lying in the bed in that state, half-paralyzed, unable to even mumble, unable to feed himself and looking helpless. As I saw him lying there in that condition, I thought to myself, I’ll take health over money, anytime.”

You can almost feel Bruce gloating as he wrote this paragraph.

However, Bret can take comfort that he isn’t alone in copping a verbal bashing from Bruce. Others to feel the author’s wrath include another brother Keith, Owen’s wife Martha, Abdullah The Butcher, Billy Robinson, Bad News Brown, Superstar Billy Graham, Dynamite Kid (at one point he has the audacity to describe Pure Dynamite – one of the most highly regarded wrestling autobiographies ever released – as “not particularly well-written”) and Davey Boy Smith (who he nicknames “Einstein” – still, you can’t blame Bruce on this one...Davey Boy did steal his wife).

Bizarrely, even Hart family patriarch Stu comes out of it looking bad. By the end of the book, a picture has been built up of a dithering old fool who put wife Helen through hell as a struggling wrestling promoter, seemingly not caring (or unaware) while the incompetent people (not Bruce, of course) he put in charge of day-to-day operations kept the territory on a rollercoaster of success to ruin and back again over 40-odd years.

Yet as nasty as the author gets with these personal attacks in Straight From The Hart, equally as perplexing are the people he praises.

Ed Whalen was regarded by many as one of the worst wrestling commentators of all time and a man who spent decades sabotaging Stampede angles and ruining the heels’ heat in interviews. Yet Bruce describes him thus: “For my money, he was the best wrestling commentator ever – better, even, than Jim Ross, Gordon Solie and Lance Russell, which is saying a lot.” Yes, Bruce, it is.

As for double-murderer Chris Benoit, Bruce acknowledges the “atrocity” of his crime, but then goes on to say, “I think it’s a shame that he’s remembered primarily for having committed that crime, rather than for having been one of the greatest workers of his generation or for having been one of the nicest guys in the business.” Er...okay.

If there’s one passage that sums up the vengeful stupidity that fills every page of this autobiography, it’s Bruce’s description of Bret’s WrestleMania match with Vince McMahon in 2010.

Being a booking wizard – throughout the book Bruce claims that whenever he was booker in Stampede, crowd numbers soared and all the angles rocked, while every other booker (especially Bret) caused the territory to decline – Bruce wrote he came up with a better scenario than the one that eventually played out in the ring and ran it past McMahon and son-in-law Triple H.

It involved Vince beating up Bret, who would stage a comeback before Triple H interfered in the match and attacked Bret. The Hitman would then be saved by Shawn Michaels.

“All the pieces would be in place for an awesome tag match nobody would have ever expected,” Bruce wrote. “Bret and Shawn taking on Vince and Triple H, perhaps at SummerSlam.”

Sadly, Bruce forgot there were two big holes in his scenario: 1. Triple H was a face at the time and booked to face heel Sheamus on the same show; and 2. The main event at WrestleMania was Shawn Michaels vs The Undertaker...so it was highly unlikely Shawn would be involved in an undercard match as well.

But that’s not how Bruce saw it. The REAL reason his brilliant booking idea got shitcanned? “I think Vince and Hunter were actually intrigued by the idea. To my surprise, the guy who did give it the thumbs down was...my brother Bret.”

Even to the end, the greatness of Bruce had been foiled by his bastard brother Bret.

Thank God he wrote this book to set the record straight..

* Straight From The Hart by Bruce Hart (ECW Press, RRP$32.95) is out now.

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, ep. 13

2011-05-08T23:34:00.002+10:00

MY LATEST podcast reviewing PWA "Glory", held in Sydney on Friday, May 6.
http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-13-holy-shit-holy-shit-holy-shit-

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, ep. 12: Feel the Sting!

2011-04-17T23:30:00.007+10:00

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-ep-12-feel-the-sting- IN WHICH host Dann Lennard and special guest star Mark Williamson discuss a range of diverse topics including * The consequences of angry wanking * The hilariousness of Immaturecontent.net * Dubbs' burgeoning acting career * Further analysis of the April PWA show in Sydney (including plenty of wacky diversions) * The merits of having dark matches on local cards * Why Matt Bailey is the "cowbell" of pro wrestling * A few cheap shots at TGP * The ever-popular "Questions For Dubbs" * Some PWA Queensland gossip, AND * Mark talks about problems he's had with a few local promoters. All in all, a pretty entertaining episode. Running time: 59 minutes

What Would Chris Benoit Do, ep. 11: "Dad, you're only making it worse"

2011-04-10T18:38:00.008+10:00

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-ep-11-dad-you-re-only-making-it-worse-

IN WHICH your host DANN LENNARD ("The most hated man in Melbourne wrestling") is joined by his regular special guest MARK "The most dangerous man in Australia" WILLIAMSON to analyse the current feud between Dann Lennard and the Facebook wall of The Gorilla Position. Yes, folk, it's the most insular, incestuous wrestling feud EVER and we're here to analyse it in great detail. And by "great detail", we mean we insult the fuck out of a bunch of backyard scrubs pretending to be wrestlers. Men like Daniel "I work in Game Traders" Glover, Heath "Death Turd" Fury and Morphine (which is what you feel like overdosing on after watching one of his matches). Dubbs shares some classic yarns about the stupidity of Mr Fury and another backyard shithead called 69er. And then I go OFF. If Morphine wanted to kill me before...if Daniel "I'm an obese asthmatic and I need a puffer to get through a match...and that's a SHOOT!" Glover wanted me to buy my own plane ticket to fly down to Melbourne so he could beat me up...well, I just upped the stakes, baby! :D After some seriously demented ranting, we return to normalcy and wrap up the podcast with a literate discussion on Vince McMahon's decision to rebrand World Wrestling Entertainment to WWE. We also do a very late recap of WMXXVII. It's 67 minutes of potentially libellous podcasting by the two funniest men in Aussie wrestling. Join us and be touched by the power of Christ...er, Chris.

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, episode 10: Needs More Bailey

2011-04-02T11:43:00.001+11:00

IN WHICH I briefly discuss last night's PWA Australia card held in Liverpool, Sydney. It was a good show, but not one of their best, to be honest. Also, I rail against the underutilisation of Matt Bailey. And also rant again about how Bombshell Bo should become the new Bull Nakano. Also, it was nice to catch up with so many great people last night including Ed Lock, Fozzy Young, Will Phoenix, Jag, Jorge Del Hommos, Lightning Luke Watts, Jak Arkham and more. :D Check out http://www.pwaaustralia.com/v2/

Running time: 8min 40sec http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-10-needs-more-bailey

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, episode 9: “No cheese, no onion”

2011-03-02T21:44:00.003+11:00

Raven

IT’S the most violent podcast so far. Do host Dann Lennard and Australia’s most dangerous man, Mark Williamson, go too far this time? YOU be the judge.

This time round, Mark tells a great Raven anecdote (eventually) after we go off track on various topics including gardening with Dan Damage, gutted wombats, Ruby Rose, Sary Jay’s retirement and buying Snowtown merchandise.

At the 16-minute mark, we reveal a shocking Adam Gambino story.

We then turn very serious and hit our major topic for the podcast. Mark talks about local wrestlers’ pay packets and their expectations when it comes to Aussie wrestling. I explain why Aussie wrestling is like country football.

And then I go off.

Yes, it’s a controversial edition of The Donkey Variety Hour, so join me, Mark and the Silent Censor for 37+ minutes of fun, truth bombs and opinionated yelling.

Running time: 37min 30sec.

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-9-no-cheese-no-onion-

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, episode 8

2011-02-27T18:12:00.002+11:00

BJ Penn

YEAH, it's a quick recap (with my thoughts) on the UFC 127 PPV from Sydney, Australia. Some big wins, some big upsets and some big fucking ridiculous judges' decisions.

Running time: 17min

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-8-don-t-leave-it-in-the-hands-of-the-judges-

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, episode 7: "We're Big In Madagascar!"

2011-02-13T11:07:00.003+11:00

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-7-we-re-big-in-madagascar-

YEAH, we're back, baby! It's me talking once more with Australia's most dangerous man, MARK WILLIAMSON!

Joined by our very, very, very, VERY special guest, we discuss the burning issues in Aussie wrestling today...we also talk a lot of shit.

This time round we discuss the reviews and comments we received about our last podcast together.

We also have a new segment titled "Questions For Dubbs". Entertaining stuff.

Next, Mark talks about his experiences at the most recent PWA show in Liverpool.

There is also discussion about the Mark Williamson Retirement Tour.

Plus much, much more........including ENEMAS!

Running time: 49min.

Mark Williamson unleashed in my best podcast ever!

2011-02-04T23:06:00.001+11:00

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-5

GUEST REVIEW by Josh King

2011-01-20T10:39:00.004+11:00

THE SHOOT REVIEW (It's real...it's damn real!)

King Kong Bundy Shoot Interview
Producer: Pro Wrestling Diary LLC
Released: May 2010.
Running Time: 3:45
Content Rating: R18

AT 458 POUNDS, it’s hard not to spill your guts. After years of silence, King Kong Bundy is back to tell a tale, which many will agree is long overdue.
A shoot interview can be a confirmation of what a wrestling mark already knows. Or, all things going to plan, it’s the addition of missing pieces of insightful information to a popular biography.
The production value usually isn’t great but the no-holds-barred commentary tends to be a good equaliser in determining whether you’ll stay fixed to your chair or if you’ll tap out and hit the off button after the first five minutes.
As is often the case in many shoot interviews, the chronology of Bundy’s career is as scrambled as eggs; in other words the subject matter isn’t pinned down in an orderly sequence like your typical WWE documentary.
But the structural shortcomings of this release are overcome by genuinely entertaining opinions, which are raw, powerful, timely, confronting, intelligent, fearless and, for the most part, humorous,
Like his famous “Avalanche” finishing maneuver, Bundymania runs wild over you with his thoughts and feelings about a number of people at all levels of the industry: promoters, wrestlers, managers and even midgets. No-one is safe while Bundy’s on tape.
And that includes the late Andre the Giant who was one of only a few men to make Bundy look small in the ring. Their working relationship was anything but harmonious.
“He was a bully,” Bundy concedes. “He was the one guy that could really hurt you in this business. If he said, ‘Vince, I want this guy gone,’ you’d be gone.’ To me, he wasn’t a nice man.”
Bundy played a heel for most of his career. Yet the man behind the character easily grows on you as someone you’d like to shout a beer and have a yarn or two with, a compliment that cannot be claimed by some of his more acknowledged peers.
Most Australian video stores with a wrestling collection do not stock shoot DVDs. But if any store managers reading this plan to start building their collection, this one would make a wise investment.
As of 2010, there have been 88 former superstars inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame. King Kong Bundy isn’t one of them
And seeing as he didn’t even get a mention in the WWE’s Top 50 Superstars Of All Time DVD, many Bundymaniacs could be waiting a lot longer.
An overdue acknowledgement of his contribution to sports entertainment is this shoot DVD’s main selling point.
Personally I hope a journalist out there has the foresight to get in contact with Bundy and organise a book deal. There’s much more to tell about the life of this wrestling legend.

NOTE: This two-disc set – including bonus footage and matches from his career – is available from http://www.highspots.com/.

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, episode 4

2011-01-08T16:42:00.006+11:00

IN WHICH I rave about PWA Australia's card last night, "Unwritten Law", especially the amazing Robbie Eagles vs Ryan Eagles 2/3 falls main event, an early contender for Aussie MOTY in 2011. I also mount a case for KC Cassidy to change her hairstyle and SHAUN Kustom and DAVE Sinclair to change their names.
Check out the link HERE.

What Would Chris Benoit Do?, episode 3

2010-12-18T10:17:00.002+11:00

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-3

My latest wrestling podcast

2010-12-12T01:27:00.003+11:00

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-2

And a littlebit extra:
http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/wwcbd02-extra

What Would Chris Benoit Do? Episode 1 is now up!

2010-12-04T21:04:00.003+11:00

SHIMMER world champion, PWWA women's champion

and PWA Wrestler Of The Year 2010, Madison Eagles

http://kirbyyourenthusiasm.libsyn.com/what-would-chris-benoit-do-episode-01

REVIEW: The Promotion

2010-11-30T16:07:00.007+11:00

THIS comic is awesome, pure and simple. Rob Schamberger has produced close to THE PERFECT PRO WRESTLING COMIC.

The Promotion feels gritty and REAL - and it does something very few other wrestling comics have tried to do and that's look at the backstage dramas between promoters and the larger-than-life personalities who worked for them during the territorial days.

While you see some recognisable faces - Dick Murdoch and Ric Flair, for example - the comic is entirely fictional yet totally believable. Rob's spot-on dialogue is a big factor in that department.

Rob describes The Promotion as "a fictional drama based around a wrestling promotion in 1970s' Kansas City...a Mad Men of professional wrestling". That sounds reasonable to me.

Having recently read the autobiographies of both Harley Race and Gary Hart, a lot in this comic rang true...to the point that I wondered whether Rob has some friends "in the biz" - possibly even from that era of pro wrestling - and he's been picking their brains.

The art could've been problematic if it stayed as just B&W pen art, as it's a bit rough in places. But Rob's cleverly used a watercolour-style colouring (almost like a colour wash) through the art – giving it a trippy, psychedelic 1970s feel. It suits the story Rob's telling wonderfully well.

And, to be frank, I was reading the comic for the story, not the art anyway.

What can I say? I loved the shit out of this comic. 4 stars, 8/10.

The first chapter of The Promotion can be found at http://www.thewrestlingpromotion.com (updated twice a week) and on http://www.myebook.com (first chapter available for $0.50).

Best local card of 2010? You betcha!

2010-07-08T22:48:00.002+10:00

Harley Wonderland and her wonder-mams

McKay...not just a tight arse. But it has to be said...

I WENT on a whim but I'm so glad I attended Pro Wrestling Women’s Association's “Last Woman Standing”, a one-night elimination tournament on Saturday, July 3 at the Liverpool Masonic Centre, Liverpool, Sydney, Australia.
A crowd of approx. 100 saw an excellent show, probably the best live card I’ve attended this year. Here are the results:

ROUND ONE
1. Shimmer & PWWA champion Madison Eagles b Shazza McKenzie
2. Savannah Summers b Harley Wonderland
3. “Rate Tank” Kellie Skater b Miami
4. Jessie McKay b Eliza Sway

Savannah pours on the pressure, but it was she who'd eventually tap out to the "Rate Tank", Skater

SEMI-FINALS
5. Skater b Summers via submission
6. Eagles b McKay

7. MEN’S TAG MATCH: Jorge Del Hommos & Robbie Eagles b JT Robinson & Sean O’Shea

TOURNEY FINAL
8. Skater b Eagles in a no-DQ, non-title match.
This was a helluva bout featuring plenty of Japanese strong-style wrestling followed by a healthy dose of FMW/ECW hard-core violence. At one point, Skater was powerbombed through a concession table. Skater later returned the favour by stabbing Eagles in the arm with a fork, Abby-style! The ending came after Eagles first poured thumb tacks all over the middle of the ring, then ascended to the top rope only to be stopped by Summers, who turned heel by hitting Eagles with a chair and throwing her off the top rope and onto the tacks. Skater scored the easy pin.

A brutal, entertaining bout to wrap up a great night of Aussie wrestling. Thankfully, the action was all caught on DVD, which will be soon available from www.pwaaustralia.com.

Slater feels the effects after being powerbombed through the concessions table by Eagles in the anything-goes final

More on Chris Colt

2010-05-08T11:12:00.003+10:00

HERE'S an interesting old wrestling article I found that links to the Christ "Chris Dupree" Colt yarn I wrote in BP#31.

Oh...wait, you wouldn't know about that yet 'cos I haven't mailed the damn things out yet. :)

Get the zine, read my article, then look at this Inside Wrestling piece (late 60s, I assume).

It's a pity there aren't any actual pix of Chris on this page.

Aaaawwwww...at least somebody loves Bryan Danielson...er, Daniel Bryan

2010-05-03T01:18:00.001+10:00

Betty Paginated #31 is here!

2010-04-28T23:08:00.003+10:00

BETTY PAGINATED #31 is now available from me. The issue contains all the usual Dann rants plus great columns and interviews by some of the leading writers in the zine world/blogosphere including Raven Mack, kami, Shane Cubis and more.

Fight fans will find coverage of last year's Hulkamania tour (I attended the Sydney show) and UFC 110 in Sydney (I was there live). There's also a profile on the controversial and openly gay rassler Chris Colt - eye-popping stuff.

Plus I analyse wrestling's best female butts with my partner in crime, Stately Wayne Manor.

For non-wrestling fans, there are interviews with Aussie comedienne Fiona O'Loughlin, Watchmen artist Dave Gibbons, Australia's greatest stuntman Grant Page and many more.

Features on "Chopper" Read, Mickey Rourke, and tributes to Lady GaGa and Bettie Page.

Plus much, much, much more.

US$10 or trade - please state you're over 18 years of age when ordering this issue.

A great story...well done, Dingo

2010-02-06T13:15:00.000+11:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCJj0rnHMTs

QUICK REVIEW: Sputnik, Masked Men, And Midgets

2009-11-04T23:26:00.003+11:00

SPUTNIK, MASKED MEN, AND MIDGETS: THE EARLY DAYS OF MEMPHIS WRESTLING by Ron Hall

THIS is a fascinating picture book that details through photos the history of Memphis rasslin up until the start of the cable TV era in the early 1980s. While the text is badly written, redundant and - at times - not particularly accurate, you probably didn't buy the book for the words in the first place. You're here for the pics and they sure don't disappoint.

There are fascinating posed photos, in-ring action shots, candid snaps + a stack of flyers, posters, newspaper articles, record covers and more. If you love the history of wrestling, then this book will delight you as much as it delighted me.

The book is divided into chapters focusing on foreign devils, the wild 60s era built around the colourful Sputnik Monroe, women wrestlers, midget wrestlers, wrestling bears and, of course, Jerry Lawler's rise to prominence in the 70s.

Again, the writing lets Sputnik, Masked Men, And Midgets down, but it's still a helluva lotta fun to sit on the dunny and check out some fantastic photos of an amazing period in wrestling history.

The book also comes with a short CD, the highlight being Sputnik's attempt to out-Blassie the great Freddie Blassie in Sputnik Hires A Band.

Fuck you, Vince Russo

2009-10-27T16:51:00.002+11:00

EVERYTHING MAKES PERFECT SENSE NOW.

This article comes direct from JIM CORNETTE himself at http://jimcornette.com/:

"TO KNOCK TNA, OR NOT TO KNOCK TNA...."
Posted October 22, 2009

Many of you know that September was a very eventful month for ol' JC. I was released by TNA on the 15th, and went to work for Ring of Honor in a surprise appearance in New York City the next week. Somehow in between I became the "most controversial man in wrestling" for about 4 days. I got so many requests for radio and internet interviews I just went on weekend vacations for two weeks to stay away from the phone. Then they caught up with me, and I had to start answering all the questions. It occurred to me that instead of trying to tell this longwinded, complicated story on every blog and broadcast in the multiverse, I would waste much less of my life if I wrote it down, and just said "See jimcornette.com for the answer". That way, I also give you, my loyal fans and followers, the rest..of..the..story.

Now, with my history of bluntness and a slight tendency toward anger management issues, everyone was waiting for me to unleash an avalanche of vitriolic verbal venom on TNA Wrestling for daring to pick my old pal Vince Russo over me. And people have been surprised when it really didn't come. Now, not to disappoint those of you who won't read the rest of the commentary unless I'm lambasting somebody, because the knockin' WILL come, but it's not directed at the company.

I would have to be truly angry at the turn of events to really vent at TNA because I do want the company to succeed. Many of the employees have been friends of mine for 20 years or more, and great people I met working there have become friends. They have a wonderful and talented roster of wrestlers, and their crew of young stars is a match for or greater than the WWE's. Most importantly, the WWE cannot have a complete monopoly on wrestling, and TNA is best positioned to keep that from happening. But I am not particularly angry at TNA. Surprised, amused, bewildered, one or more of those would cover it, but not angry.

When I first went to work for TNA in June 2006 I was very excited. After my flameups with the WWE in 2005, I was sick of wrestling, and did very little for a year except legends reunions with the Midnight Express, and a very enjoyable run with Ring of Honor. Dutch Mantell had been calling me for about 6 months, but with my ROH commitments, and a knee injury and subsequent surgery, I could not start with TNA until summer. I had never watched TNA specifically because I knew Vince Russo had some part in it. But he had been fired some time before this, and so I began watching the TV show, and got fired up because they had great potential. Good talent, national TV, PPV, all the tools. I agreed to a deal as the TNA authority figure, the position that I have occupied most of the last three years.

Unfortunately, my excitement was tempered early. Dutch called me in September 2006 to let me know there was an "addition to the creative team.......Vince Russo." "No! It can't be!" I thought to myself, as my mind boggled. "I've done everything right! I moved from Connecticut to Kentucky in 1999 to get away from him and his paper-carrying sycophant Ed Ferrara! I've lived in a Russo-free zone for 7 years! I only took a job with TNA because they had already fired him! I'm supposed to be safe!"

But alas, I was not. No wrestler or wrestling fan was safe. Russo was back.

Jeff Jarrett called me personally to try to convince me it was somehow a good move, and that we could really all work together, just to give it a chance. No, in answer to the question I am asked constantly, NO ONE has ever explained to me exactly why, to quote your emails, "in the flying fuck" Vince Russo gets hired in the wrestling business. Besides a vague "he has good ideas", I've never gotten any real details. Anyway, I mulled this over for a week until the next taping, and when I saw Jeff and Dutch in person, I told them I'd decided to give my notice. They could have a heel attack and injure me, and I could finish up until such point that Russo was gone, which I couldn't grasp would take very long. I felt having us in the same place would distract from business, I had no desire to BE in the same place with him, and there has never been a day when his opinions on pro wrestling and what he thinks it should be have ever coincided with mine.

I have to give it to Jeff, he inherited a silver tongue. Of course, it helps that his grandmother made it possible for me to be in wrestling. His father gave me my start and gimmick. Dutch Mantell talked me through my first TV angle when I had been in the business three weeks and was scared shitless, and has been my friend for 30 years. Jeff refused my notice, told me I'd have to no-show and be the heel because I was still working there, and they proceeded to somehow convince me that Russo and I could coexist and made me promise to try.

Jeff followed this up shortly after by asking me to start fulltime as an agent/producer as well as my on-camera role. I took this to be evidence that what I had been told, that Russo's influence would be tempered by wrestling people, was true. It was at this point that I made the one mistake I regret, going the more-money, more-stress, more-Russo route with TNA, instead of sticking with the less-money, less stress, more fun and satisfaction route with Ring of Honor. I was genuinely convinced that the Russo thing would be an experiment that didn't work, and that I could still help be a part of TNA becoming a successful contender to Vince McMahon's position as the industry leader. Looking back, I see that I was delusional, possibly the same syndrome that sees kidnap victims bond with their captors or something. But by cracky, I had given my word!

Well, it didn't take real long before the excitement wore down a touch as I began to watch the same Russo effluvia permeate the TV formats, and I must admit the check was a huge help in making the experience more palatable. On some occasions early on, as I sat listening to what this idiot had written for the wrestlers to perpetrate at that particular taping, I began thinking I could just get in the car and drive home, that my hopes for TNA becoming a real contender were fruitless, because even if Russo was replaced, it may very well be too late to save the company. Anything that followed was doomed because the promotion would forevermore bear his stench. We were wasting our time. I gradually, over the past few years, began to try not to take the product so personally, and concentrate instead on the positives--working with a lot of other people that I really like and having fun talking with them about anything BUT wrestling, teaching the younger talent and helping them gain experience, being a part of keeping McMahon away from that monopoly. I reconciled myself to the fact that even if Eddie Graham came back to life tomorrow, the wrestling business will never recover from some of the things that have been done to it, so why should I have a nervous breakdown over it? Jeff and Dutch were still there to temper the more offensive or ridiculous things he might do, but obviously, from the lack of real forward progress in the past three years, it's been heavily Russo-ish the whole time.

I don't want to give the impression I was ever going through the motions with my work. My on-camera appearances have always been praised, I put a lot of effort into making them as logical and credible as possible even under some trying and downright silly situations. As an agent/producer, I would lay out matches and situations to the talent, and sometimes in doing this, either the talent, myself or both would make changes in Russo's original format, for wrestling reasons, or just so they would not be so embarassed performing whatever was being asked of them that night. Jeff was the final authority in making the change, which he usually did. I always wanted the segments I was responsible for to do as much good for the talent, or the angle to sell tickets, as possible.

Vinny-ru and I even began speaking. Not about wrestling, of course, but we were putting the effort out there, having cordial conversations about trivia, even shaking hands when saying hello and goodbye. But we are doomed to clash at some point, because there can be no two people in this universe more polar opposite of each other on a subject than Russo and I are about pro wrestling. Eventually, we will be like matter and anti-matter colliding. Or, perhaps like Bob Armstrong once said, "We're like mind over matter--I don't mind, and he doesn't matter." I would have to sit in the production meetings and watch people roll their eyes or shake their heads as Russo's brilliant scriptwriting and compelling angles were read aloud. I would sit in embarassment as the Spike TV representative zoned out on the nonsense, thinking "he's going back to the UFC shoot and telling their crew that the guy that writes our wrestling show can't even spell." I would see big money PPV matchups given away for free and lasting 4 minutes, talent not getting over, Pay-per-views not selling, people confused as to who the "good guys and bad guys" are, the giant brawls, the bad comedy, the weirdness toward women, and all the other things associated with Russo's style of booking. I would have to look promising young talent or experienced veteran talent in the eye and explain to them what that night's format was asking them to do, and then stand there defenseless and ashamed as they vented their frustrations, telling me what I already knew about why it wouldn't work, why it was crazy or insane or counterproductive to the company's best interests. In media interviews I would do songs and dances around the constant criticisms of the booking, not wanting to knock the company just because they employ this one guy, but finding it impossible to defend the indefensible.

Other than this awkward Bizarro world I was existing in with the presence of my doppelganger, TNA was a box of fluffy ducks. Early this year, Keith Mitchell and David Sahadi, the producer and director of the TV show, asked management that I be the only agent working with them in the truck. Usually, whatever segments an agent produced with talent, he would sit in the truck for and help the director not miss shots, especially on live events, as well as music cues, working with the referee on headset, etc. With all respect to the other agents, I had more TV experience in giving them what they needed because of my advanced age and obsessive-compulsive wrestling knowledge. Being the only agent in the truck meant I did all my matches, then got with the other agents and got all their info as well, so I had to know EVERYTHING for the whole night. This promotion was not accompanied by a raise, but in all honesty I have fun in the TV truck so I actually wanted to do it. I was gratified when some young talent would tell me I was making a difference in their game or their careeers with my advice, when some veterans would ask me for help in changing what was written or enlist my help in doing so. I resigned myself to the fact that I could be no major help to TNA as long as Russo was around, but I could certainly help it's talent, have fun away from the ring and be paid somewhat reasonable money to do so.

This is where things began to take a turn for the conspiracy theorists. When Jeff Jarrett had issues with TNA this past Summer that have been covered elsewhere, he was taken off creative and not present at TV's. Soon after, Dutch Mantell was released after 7 years with TNA. With Jeff not present, the usual "final authority" was gone, and five or six people could qualify as the "final authority" in one way or another. I was asked by at least two people of stature in the company to step up in making sure the tapings came off properly in Jeff's absence. I generally produced the segments of most difficulty (the 30 man, 4 location brawl), or most importance (involving the main event talent). As well, I began efforts to convince everyone to push the younger TNA roster, the newer faces, and began producing all of Matt Morgan and Hernandez's matches and promos. I was hoping to do the same with Bobby Lashley. Some had thought because I was not on camera for the past several months my work in TNA had diminished but, in fact, it increased over the summer, and I had requested to be taken out of an on-camera role because I thought my work backstage was more important. My agent reports were praised by management as informative , detailed and "exactly what we need."

The final set of TV tapings I made for TNA was at the end of August. I had called Russo aside at the previous tapings, and told him that regardless of what had gone on between us in the past or our differences about wrestling, I would help him with finishes and getting these young guys over if he would listen to me. I don't know if it would have worked, (I wasn't there long enough), but I really offered and didn't even make it sound like I was telling him he didn't know what he was doing. So he calls me, for the first time ever, on my way to the tapings and says he needs my help on a match for Monday. I had seen the format, and it would be something awkward for the wrestlers to execute, so I suggested something that kept his result and one of his main points, but made it easier for the talent to do and the viewer to understand. We agreed on this.

On Monday at the meeting, I saw the formats, and this match was completely changed with yet a third version, nothing like what we had discussed and three times as confusing. After the general meeting, in the agents meeting, I lobbied to change it back to what we had agreed on on Friday. I gave all the reasons, that the wrestlers could not execute it, the crew shoot it, or the viewers understand it as written, it was too busy, and it got no one over. After I explained what I thought was wrong, and why the Friday version would work better, there was discussion and everyone agreed to it. It is always frustrating trying to get 8 people to agree on the same thing. It's like writing a murder mystery, it's a lot easier to write your own than to have someone else write the crime and then you have to figure out who did it. But the discussion was no more vehement than usual, and there was no screaming, personal slurs, threats or physical violence. The segment ended up better than it would have been if the other version had been attempted, but still nothing to write home about. Over the Labor Day weekend, I sent in my report covering these tapings, including the discussion about and execution of the aforementioned segment in detail. Terry Taylor of TNA Talent Relations emailed me on Tuesday "good report--sending it in just as is."

Seven days later he called to release me.

His exact words were "Bad news, we've gotta let you go." My response was basically along the lines of, "What the fuck did I do?" He explained that "the company" felt that I wasn't all the way behind TNA and the direction they wanted to go. After a brief conversation which didn't clarify much, I asked to speak to Dixie Carter the next day. Speaking to both Terry and Dixie, here is the bottom line. They said I wasn't 100% on the TNA team. I illustrated how I was, never missing shots, first guy in the building even though I drive over 800 miles, etc. They narrowed it down to I wasn't behind the CREATIVE direction, to which I had to honestly reply, "No, I'm not. I'm behind TNA but I can't be behind Vince Russo's creative." There was mention that I was "not behind pushing the young guys", which was patently ridiculous as that's all I had been preaching, and apparently came from my being against Eric Young laying out Sting and Hernandez with a baseball bat and then standing over them cutting a promo on the PA mic. Because I was against that particular young guy getting pushed in that particular segment, it had apparantly been used to convince folks I was against pushing the young talent. You can see where the Green Acres flavor in these exchanges could be amusing. We left the conversation halfass pleasantly with Dixie saying I had done "a great job" and the door was always open if I could commit 100% to the direction, and me saying I would love to work with TNA again sometime but never with Vince Russo. At this point, I was just bewildered that a guy who can barely speak English had once again convinced a person of importance that he is a benefit to their wrestling company. Then it got stranger.

A story went out on the internet, later traced to someone sympathetic to the Russo cause (I don't have a name but that qualification narrows things down) who was apparently afraid TNA, Russo, or both would look like heels to the fans for letting me go in his favor. It claimed I had screamed and yelled at Russo in that meeting and/or physically went after him, and had been fired as a result. It spread around far enough in two days that I had to have TNA issue a statement denying it, and after more people started reporting it never happened, it died down, but it's still out there if you look for it. I'm not saying it's not plausible, but if it had happened I'd be telling you every word I said. Just as I was getting unhappy about this, Ed Ferrara showed up at their Sunday PPV and everything became clear.

For those who don't know, Ferrara is the other half of my eternal torment, the Lou Costello to Russo's Bud Abbott on the standup stage in my own personal wrestling Hell. They split for a few years, but apparently have kissed and made up. I have not seen Ed Ferrara since I vented my disgust on him in 2002 over his mockery of Jim Ross' Bells Palsy on national television. It's safe to say he doesn't want to be around me, and especially in the absence of Dutch and Jeff and the presence of Russo, there's no way I could tolerate him either.

In the previous seven days, Russo and/or his supporters had convinced Dixie Carter that reuniting the team of he and Ferrara would cause something good to happen and/or that the changes I had been making in his product was the cause of TNA not being more successful. A number of people have remarked that I had to be making Russo uncomfortable just by doing my job, by pointing out what was wrong with his writing and pulling something halfway better out of my ass on spur-of-the-moment notice. Well, I believe I would have won this one with the popular vote, but I lost it in the electoral college. Vince remains a genius at selling himself and incapable of selling a ticket. I did tell Terry Taylor that I was disappointed that they couldn't tell me, "We're hiring Ed Ferrara" and give me the opportunity to resign. But other than that disappointment, and frustration over what was a wasted effort on my part at trying to get some good done in a few different areas of the company, I'm not mad. Not angry. Not pissed.

Bewildered, as I said, at how he does it. How he convinces people he can do something that he's never actually had any success at doing. Amused, at the preposterousness of it all. Relieved, that a burden is off of me of having to coexist with someone I dislike and trying to avoid criticizing the company I work for. More relieved that I'm avoiding a 1700 mile round trip drive twice a month. Excited, to get back into the pro wrestling business with Ring of Honor. But not pissed. I'm not going to knock anything else about TNA besides Vince Russo, because I want my friends and associates and proteges to succeed and make a lot of money. I don't want Vince McMahon to own wrestling. I don't want to tear TNA down. But my frustration there has always existed because the company, it's talent and crew deserve so much more success than the "work" Russo turns in has allowed them to have. I can only imagine my blood pressure at having to work with the same writing team that made WCW the biggest money-losing company in wrestling history in 2000.

I admit that I am guilty of what many of you have accused me of--consorting with Vince Russo, working for a company that employs Vince Russo, going against everything I have ever believed or said publicly. I hope this column somewhat explains the position I was in, and halfass vindicates me. If not, I deserve and will accept your scorn and ridicule. In my defense, the one thing I never did was defend any of his writing or ideals--I still had to be able to look myself in the mirror. But it is not without shame that I have spent the last three years fighting the battle of whether the money I earned and the good I was able to do for others justified my tacit approval of this knuckledragging cretin having a job in the sport so many of us love.

Many people reacted to the news of my release like it was a funeral. As you can see, there were a few bright spots for me. I was pleased with my compensation for the amount of days I worked per month but I've had, and quit, and been fired from higher-paying jobs. I am looking forward to my new position with ROH because I want to do anything I can to help a wrestling company that's trying to grow. I have this website, jimcornette.com, and another book project I am working on to follow up the Midnight Express book. I have plans to make my wrestling collectibles business, cornettescollectibles.com, even bigger in 2010 with a landmark series of authorized classic wrestling DVD's. I'm doing selected fanfests and dealer's shows with my merchandise booth, and still reuniting with the Midnights a few times a year. I am in no imminent danger of being evicted from my home, and am taking most of the winter off on purpose, so everyone can relax, I have plenty of things to keep me occupied.

As always I appreciate everyone's support, and the hundreds of emails I have received from all of you with similar viewpoints of Russo's talents have been encouraging and entertaining. In my next Commentary, I hope to take a more positive tone, with my thoughts on my position with Ring of Honor, why I am a fan of the promotion, and where I see it going in the next 5 years. Don't miss it!

Random YouTube Reviews

2009-09-19T19:41:00.011+10:00

LET'S kick off with Carlo Cannon disrespects the EPW Tag Team Championship Belt. Carlo's a talented dude but who knew he had such a flair for comedy? Combine this with Mikey Jay's camerawork and some impressive cameos by the likes of Julian James and you have heat-seeking gold.

FROM here, we jump to an intense video response from Davis Storm, one of the opponents challenging for Carlo & Slex's EPW tag team belts. This sorta off-the-cuff, semi-shoot interview is what's sadly missing from the overly scripted WWE of 2009. Makes me almost wanna see this match.......except it's already been held and Storm and Jimmy Payne got their arses handed to them. Never mind, fellas.

Time for a preview for Perth-based EPW Presents BREAKING POINT, held in August 2009. I love EPW action - hard-hitting and, damn! Hard-hitting. :D

MANIAC Wayne Mattei is a monster.

Adam Gambino on a road trip? I hope he brought plenty of snacks to sustain him for the long drive. One question: how did he fit in the car?

AS MUCH as I question the way the Australian Wrestling Federation is run, you can't deny they've featured some great action over the past 10 years. A Decade Of AWF DVD Trailer features some great talent like Cima, Raven, Mad Man Pondo, Sabu and others. If someone wants to burn me a copy of that DVD, feel free to do so. I sure as shit ain't paying for it.

I HATE poetry with a passion, but this 2005 "Ode to Lobo" by Mr Mark Williamson is pretty sweet.

SPEAKING of Mr Williamson, drunk or sober he's one of the top three most entertaining promos in Australia today. This promo is delivered drunk, but he still manages to deliver a few shoot punches to the bruised kidneys of Melbourne wrestling. This interview is frickin' awesome.

LET'S finish with one of the best Aussie wrestling angles/feuds of recent years: the "Mad Bastard" Krackerjak against Australian Idol judge and radio disc jockey Ian "Dicko" Dickson. Dicko insults rasslin' and Krackers vows revenge at WrestleRock 14. This clip shows why Krackerjak is THE best promo guy in Aussie wrestling today. I will return to Mr Krackers in my next YouTube review.

Stream-of-consciousness YouTube Review #1

2009-09-04T19:56:00.014+10:00

WHERE to start? Where to start? How about we kick off this rasslin' orgy of fun-ness with the disturbingly homoerotic Blackjack Mulligan & Joe Savoldi are against suicide? Watch this 1986 public service ad and tell me it doesn't look like BJ is giving "Jumping" Joe a good reason to jump? :O

From there we skip to a 1986 instalment of Jake Roberts' The Snake Pit in the WWF where the vicious one - recently turned babyface - interviews Blackjack Mulligan and they talk about.......WWF ice-cream bars?!? It's a rare moment when someone can one-up Jake on an interview, but good ol' BJ does it here. This may be one of the more surreal moments in Jake's ultra-surreal life.

So we're off and running on a Jake "The Snake" Roberts theme. Let's see him at the height of his creative genius: talking to those PWI geeks on an episode of Georgia Championship Wrestling in the early 80s. At this point, Jake was a member of "Precious" Paul Ellering's Legion Of Doom, along with the Road Warriors and King Kong Bundy, I believe. Jake was so awesome before he fucked himself up on drugs. No-one exuded such pure slimy evil as "The Snake". Yet, at the same time, this interview comes across as refreshingly honest and open. Jake is a businessman - a nasty businessman who likes hurting Ronnie Garvin in the ring, but there's nothing personal. It's all about the money, baby.

Now we leap forward to the notorious Legends Of Wrestling PPV from 1999 and we can see how far Jake had fallen. First up, there's this erm...interesting interview where an extremely intoxicated and/or high Roberts tries to insult his opponent Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart. Not a lot makes sense here except:

"You don't want to play cards with me because I cheat. Okay? I cheat. You wanna play 21? I've got 22. You want to play blackjack? I've got two of those, too!"

Let's stick with the PPV. OK, I'm two beers in and getting both tipsy and surly. Not unlike Jake...although by this stage in the night he'd had about 22 more beers than me. While Jim waits in the ring for his opponent, Jake staggers to ringside for the PPV's main event. He takes forever to get there, deposits his pet python in the corner, then heads back up the ramp. While the commentators try to cover this embarrassment, Jake re-emerges at ringside minus his T-shirt. It's not a pretty sight. Y'know, once, Jake Roberts wore some pretty cool ring tights. Twenty years and 50kg down the road, he's reduced to wearing tracksuit pants. Mmmmm, not a good look. So.....Jake spots a female fan at ringside and decides it's a good idea to stagger over, grab her hands and rub them against his nipples. This is getting revolting. Can I endure the match itself? Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooo.......I'm tapping out to this debacle and calling it quits for the night. Bye Jake.

Now...THIS is moddafockin' wresslin'!!!

2009-09-02T11:35:00.002+10:00

Oh my wordy lord yes! Go Sheiky, baby!

LONG-OVERDUE BOOK REVIEW: The Midnight Express and Jim Cornette 25th Anniversary Scrapbook

2009-08-28T23:59:00.001+10:00

LET'S not mince words: this book is FUCKING AWESOME.

I've read some great wrestling-related books over the years: Mick Foley's first two books, Ric Flair's autobiography, Terry Funk's autobio, Emerson Murray's book on Bruiser Brody.......but this gazumps them all.

While it tells the story of the greatest tag team of all time - as told by the always-entertaining Jim Cornette - this isn't strictly a biography on the Midnight Express (or Dennis Condrey or Bobby Eaton or Stan Lane either).

It is a genuine scrapbook filled to overflowing with rare photos, programs, payment slips, angry fan letters, court documents etc etc. Plus a bunch of cool articles on some of the bigger crowd brawls the MX got caught up in, the best-known MX in-the-ring spots (that's worth the price of the book alone), classic Cornette quotes and the proverbial much, much more.

If that wasn't fascinating enough, you have a listing of just about every MX match ever held, including Cornette's priceless running commentary on what was going on at that time with the team, himself, the promotion (the World Class section is a real eye-opener) and wrestling in general.

Most importantly, where possible, Jim has listed gate receipts and crowd numbers. It proves just how important the MX were back in the 1980s in selling out houses and making money for any company they worked for (whether it was Mid-South, World Class or NWA).

I'm not the only one to have said this, but I'll add my view to the long list: this book is essential reading for all true wrestling fans.

You haven't already got it, what's wrong with you? It's available directly from Jim Cornette either here or here.

DANN'S CALL?: The best wrestling book on the market today.
RATING: A+

All Japan forever

2009-08-28T23:51:00.002+10:00

REVIEW: "Los Campeones De La Lucha Libre"...everything's buena!

2009-08-23T22:19:00.009+10:00

THERE is so much to like about this 2008 animated brainbuster made by Aussies Lili Chin and Eddie Mort (of Mucha Lucha! fame) and Keith Rainville (the brains behind the awesome From Parts Unknown zine). I caught its second screening - a second premiere, if you like - at Mu-Meson Archives in Sydney last night and I was blown away!

If you enjoyed Mucha Lucha! when it screened on The Cartoon Network, then you'll understand where the film's animation, action and humour is coming from. But Los Campeones De La Lucha Libre takes what you saw in a children's TV series to a whole new level, particularly when it comes to violence and the accurate depiction of genuine wrestling holds (don't want the kiddies seeing how a backbreaker or Boston crab is performed, then executing them on their little brother, right?)

While it's heavily geared towards those punters who already understand and love the sport of lucha libre and the pop culture surrounding it (particularly all them so-bad-they're-buena Santo films), pretty much any fan of madcap cartoons are gonna love it.

Add to that a heap of monsters, ultra-violence, a cool soundtrack and the FINAL performance by the late, great Lux Interior from The Cramps...and you have a fucking AWESOME comedy action movie. Incredibly, it is also very respectful towards the sport of lucha libre.

The plot of Los Campeones De La Lucha Libre is simple yet effective. A mysterious stranger seeks help from the legendary Dragon Rojo to save his village from an attack by a gang of marauders. Dragon refuses but his idealistic son Dragon Rojo Jr takes up the offer and quickly gathers a group to help him: US masked man Mr Profesional, the tiny brawler Tsetse Fly, female warrior Sorpresa, and the cold and cruel Rayo X (superbly voiced by Lux). Do I need to add that Rayo X steals every scene he's in? I thought not. :)

Los Campeones face many trials before they reach the threatened village, but when they get there they discover that all is not as it seems. What shall they do? Will they overcome the revelation of this disturbing secret and defeat the marauding menace? And can Dragon Rojo Jr defend his family honour and win the respect of his father?

Oh, you better fucking believe it! This film is a joyous celebration of everything that makes lucha libre so great. If you can find a way to see it somewhere, ANYWHERE, then I highly recommend you do it ASAP!

Check out the official web site at http://loscampeones.net/ for more groovy info!

I've seen the future of Australian wrestling - and his name is...

2009-08-16T13:22:00.003+10:00

PIC CREDIT: www.myspace.com/newphotography_au

PIIIIIIIIIIIIRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE!!!!!!!!

(or William B. Kidd as he calls himself)

Go see this damn movie!

2008-12-17T10:52:00.007+11:00

The Wrestler
Hopscotch, rated TBA, out January 15
The gist: Randy “The Ram” Robinson (Mickey Rourke) was a pro-wrestling superstar in the 80s. Now, he’s a broken-down bum, working in a supermarket during the week and reliving old glories on weekends, wrestling in front of small crowds in bingo halls. He lives to entertain the fans, because that's all he has in his going-nowhere life. After a particularly violent bout - where he and Necro Butcher take turns destroying each other with chairs, barbed wire, thumbtacks and stapler guns - Randy has a heart attack and, for the first time, has to contemplate the possibility of never wrestling again. Feeling lost, he tries to form a relationship with stripper Cassidy (Marisa Tomei), and attempts to mend a shattered relationship with his estranged daughter. Then Randy gets a once-in-a-lifetime offer to do a match with his legendary 80s enemy The Ayatollah (Ernest "The Cat" Miller) that could rekindle his fading career, even though getting in the ring could also kill him. Will The Ram come out of retirement and risk donning the tights one last time?
Selling points: Rourke, who deserves an Oscar for a gripping performance as a washed-up athlete who knows nothing but wrestling; Tomei looks sensational (she has great tits) and acts her socks off as the ageing stripper who’s coming to the same realisation as Randy: you can’t keep doing the same shit forever. In fact, she's smarter than The Ram, 'cos she's thinking about getting out of a ruthless business where youth and looks are everything. The backstage shenanigans - where wrestlers discuss their matches and spots, the scenes where Randy chugs down pain pills or shoots himself up with steroids, and the wild partying after shows - has an air of authenticity. And the in-ring stuff looks great - even Mickey doesn't look out of place in the squared circle. Writer Robert D. Siegel and director Darren Aronofsky have done a magnificent job in covering pro-wrestling honestly but with dignity. It reveals what drives these athletes to do what they do: the drive, the obsession, the passion, the pain...the madness. Anyone, wrestlers and non-wrestlers alike, can enjoy this movie - it's that fucking good.
It’s kinda like: A grittier Rocky (everyone seems to be saying that), but with more boobs and grown men being attacked by stapler guns.
Final word: The best movie of 2009.

The Maniac returns!

2008-10-28T10:06:00.002+11:00

I suggest Adelaide folk head to nightmarewrestling.com.au for more details!

Can I twiddle that Ariel?

2008-10-23T16:53:00.002+11:00

SERIOUSLY, fuck. Fucking fuck. Fucking fuck fuck.

TNA are fucking idiots for losing Shelly Martinez's services.

This is the muthafuckin'...

2008-10-21T14:17:00.003+11:00

...FABULOUS FREEBIRDS, muthafuckas!

Freebirds, baby! Yeeeeeeah!!!

Er......................this not so much.............................. :/

BPJr #2 is out now...on PDF

2008-10-04T17:44:00.002+10:00

BPJr #2 - filled with big booties, Jack Kirby, Steve Gerber, wrestling, Deal Or No Deal and more T&A than is healthy - is finished and ready to be sent out…as a PDF.

Yes, Australia Post has finally battered me into submission. I can’t afford the ridiculous postal costs for what is essentially a vanity project/hobby.

So here’s how it goes. You’re on my mailing list. Please e-mail me at danhelen@idx.com.au and let me know how you want BP sent to you. There are three options:

1. Printable PDF: You can print this out at work or at home. As this issue was created in A5 format (before I changed my mind about having it printed), it’s laid out as if it was going on a photocopier. That means it’s a little difficult to follow in places. However, like I said, if you want to print it out so you can have a hard copy, then this is the best format.

2. Readable PDF: All 24 A5 pages will be sent to you in order, from 1 to 24, with no wacky page layouts to worry about.

3. Hard copy: If you don’t have access to a printer or you can’t read a PDF, then let me know and I’ll send you a hard copy. This is extremely limited as I printed only 20 copies to sell at the Newcastle Young Writers Festival. Any left over will be mailed out to people who ask for them. Once they’re gone, I won’t be printing any more. So get in early if this is the version you want.

Payment? I don’t know. How do you pay for a PDF? I’ll leave it up to you. I don’t think money’s the right thing to ask for. I’m always interested in reading cool zines, comics, magazines, books or seeing interesting DVDs. Burn me something. Hell, e-mail me something if you like.

However, if you want a hard copy, then that will cost US$5 (including airmail postage and handling). I’ll accept only Paypal (no cash, money orders or cheques will be accepted, sorry) and please use dlennard@acp.com.au when making payment. Thanks.

OK. Any queries? Drop me a line.

Oh, and although this is obvious, please state in your e-mail that you’re over 18 years of age. Thanks.

Cheers,

Dann Lennard

Editor

BPJr/Betty Paginated

This is muthafuckin' wrestling!

2008-10-04T11:05:00.001+10:00

FUCK, YEAH!
Abdullah The Butcher vs Mad Man Pondo on September 27 in Evansville, Indiana.

Blassie...

2008-07-01T15:10:00.002+10:00

Classy.

Nancy in HUSTLER...erm...yeah...

2008-07-01T14:24:00.002+10:00

I mean...it was wrong of Hustler to publish these shots.'

But is it wrong of me to reprint them in my blog? And is it wrong to admit Nancy was fucking hot back in the early 80s and these pix turn me on?

....yeah, probably...

It was a year ago today (give or take a week)...

2008-07-01T14:22:00.002+10:00

...THAT Chris Benoit killed Nancy and his son Daniel.

Watched my first Benoit match in 12 months the other night: "Pegasus Kid" Chris Benoit/Steve "Dr Death" Williams vs Owen Hart/Bam Bam Bigelow from New Japan. Of the four, three are dead and Williams barely survived a cancer scare. Grim stuff. :(

This is motherfuckin' old-school...

2008-05-30T16:16:00.004+10:00

Poffo-mania!

Sweet Daddy Siki, baby!
Gary Hart (king of managers) and the immortal Abdullah The Butcher. Abe Coleman...

Matt Borne, Buzz Sawyer and Percy Pringle...that's wrestling depravity gold right there.

This is muthafuckin' puroresu (rasslin')

2008-05-01T15:56:00.002+10:00

This is muthafuckin' "We Are Family" wrestling!

2008-05-01T14:57:00.004+10:00

SWEET 'N' SOUR INCORPORATED: Bobby Dempsey, Larry Sweeney, Chris Hero and Tank Toland

THE HART FOUNDATION (c.1997): Owen Hart (deceased), Brian Pillman (deceased), Bret Hart, Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart, "British Bulldog" Davey Boy Smith (deceased)

THE YORK FOUNDATION (clockwise from top left): Richard Morton, Alexandra York, Terrence Taylor, Thomas Rich as WCW six-man champs

BLOOD GENERATION

HOUSE OF HUMPERDINK

LAX

THE ODDITIES

So long, Nature Boy

2008-04-08T21:14:00.003+10:00

You're the reason I became a smart wrestling fan. Thanks for all the memories.

So long, legends

2008-04-08T21:13:00.000+10:00

WITH the retirement of "Nature Boy" Ric Flair at Wrestlemania XXIV, it seems better late than never to say farewell to another wrestling legend, Aussie veteran Wayne "Lofty/Punisher" Pickford.

His farewell match took place atUWA Punishment on Sunday, February 24 at Seven Hills/Toongabbie RSL. Pickford challenged UWA Ultimate champion Will Phoenix and put his career on the line. Just like in a match held several weeks later, Phoenix won and The Punisher's long career was over.

It was a strong match and a great way for Lofty to end his career, which began when he was trained by original Fabulous Kangaroo Roy Heffernan many, many years ago.

A great old-school heel, Pickford always added that extra element of heel magic to any show he was on. And he was a hard-hitting bastard, too.

Loved yer work, Lofty. Enjoy your retirement.

Jeff Hardy's a douchebag...

2008-03-25T16:16:00.003+11:00

I HAD to shitcan my interview with the WWE superstar in "Fighting Words" for the March 31 People as it was all about Jeff's upcoming WrestleMania appearance and...well, um...he's not going to be there now due to failing a drug test. So the interview was dropped from the column (basically on deadline, too). It seems a shame to waste the interview, though, so here it is anyway.

[head]
Dare to succeed
[intro]
HE’S WWE’s most daring of daredevils, Intercontinental champ JEFF HARDY. The death-defying risk-taker will put his body on the line – along with seven other wrestlers – in a “Money In The Bank” ladder match at WrestleMania XXIV in Orlando, Florida. The 15-year veteran talked recently about his upcoming bout at WWE’s biggest event of the year.
[text]
THIS is your sixth appearance in a WrestleMania, Jeff. Do you still get butterflies in your stomach over it?
“With me, every Monday night on RAW, I’m always nervous before I go out in front of any crowd. WrestleMania’s a little more intimidating ’cos there’s so many people there and such a big deal. I always have the butterflies but that makes you know you’re alive.”
Do you ever think about the potential for serious injury going into such a dangerous match?
“It’s hard not to think about it. Honestly, man, I’ve been waiting for something to break. I’ve been very fortunate I’ve gone this far and haven’t broken anything. With luck, I’ll make it through ’Mania and be OK, but it’s always in the back of your mind.”
Did you and your brother Matt ever consider, growing up, you’d one day perform at WrestleMania?
“It was a dream but, at the same time, it was a goal we set ourselves, too: ‘Man, we gotta make it to ’Mania…that’s when we’ll know we’ve made it.’”
What’s your earliest memory of wrestling?
“I think WrestleMania IV [in 1988] when “Macho Man” Randy Savage won the heavyweight title in a tournament. That’s when Matt and I first started watching wrestling and fell in love with it.”
Jeff, there are some other big matches at this year’s event. Two legends collide when Ric Flair faces Shawn Michaels in what could possibly be Flair’s last match.
“If it’s gonna be Ric’s last match it’ll be a great way for him to go out: at WrestleMania against Shawn. I don’t think he could ask for a better match than that.”
Big Show vs boxing champ Floyd Mayweather – what does Floyd need to do to defeat the giant Show?
“Maybe do the same thing when Show got on his knees [at No Way Out when Floyd punched him in the nose] and at least this time knock him out, but that’s the impossible. It’s gonna be interesting to see what happens.”
* WWE WrestleMania XXIV is live on Main Event next Monday at 10am (replays 4.30pm & 9.30pm) and runs for four hours. There’ll also be encore presentations all day on April 1, 2 & 6.

UWF vs PWA...no arguments

2008-02-16T12:10:00.000+11:00

I'VE been to two local shows so far this year and they've been as different as chalk and cheese.

First up was UWF at Merrylands RSL on January 6. Christ, the wrestling was ordinary.

Some of the UWF cruiserweights - who I have a lot of time for - didn't gel well with outsiders like The Captain and Mike Vandal. I'm sure that was one of the reasons why Vandal got his face smashed in accidentally by Mikey Lord in their bout. It wasn't Mikey's fault - the pair just didn't click in the ring.

And there are too many fucking valets and minders and managers and hangers-on. Hey, it's great the young guys can use their mates on the show, but COME ON. Adam Lord's "security" are smaller than him. It's laughable. Unless it's supposed to be a joke - I sure didn't get it.

Grynder & Viktor "Crusher" Volkov are big, lumbering, inexperienced (especially Volkov) and shouldn't be holding the tag belts. But, Jesus wept! They're a million times better than the previous tag team champs, CJ Irwin and Big Phil Picasso. Phil's a great entertainer, but when it's up to HIM to carry the team, then you know you're in trouble. Col's a nice guy but he's the shittest wrestler in Australia and, quite possibly, the world. He can't do a single move or hold correctly. Just godawful in every aspect.

And UWF may well employ the most untalented, annoying ring announcer/commentator in the biz today, Steve Sims. Steve, you're a racist, obnoxious cocksucker. And that's all I have to say about him.

All in all, this card disappointed me greatly. There's some real talent on the UWF roster but they're being misused, I feel. And the younger guys need to work with more guys who don't train with them, just so they can grow and develop as workers.

As for Col and Steve, the sooner both of them disappear from the ring, the better.

UWF "Hold Nothing Back" (Merrylands RSL - 80): Amy Campbell b Natalie Garcia, Adam Lord (w/- Kristy Steele and Papi Chulo & Mr. Brown of Adam Lord Security) b The Captain, Mikey Lord b Mike Vandal (w/- Matt Wolf) - count out, Cruiserweight Title - Alex Rudka (c) b Luke Miller, Morbid b Matt Wolf (w/- Gene Knight), Greg Stekker b MH Cydell, Tag Team Title - Grynder & Viktor "Crusher" Volkov b CJ Irwin & Phil Picasso

Savannah Summers works on Madison's arm

ANYWAY, the PWA card on February 9 was completely different. The company has one of the deepest rosters in Australia and there wasn't a bad match on the night. The three-way bout with Japan's Shadow Phoenix going over Pyro, the women's tag match (featuring an awesome out-of-the-ring bump by Savannah Summers...my second cousin, by the way) and great individual performances by the likes of Blakestone, Bishop Sommers, etc, made this a top night of in-ring action.

I also like the fact that PWA brings in some great interstate and overseas talent: Mimic, Sorrow and Savannah from SA, gorgeous tattooed Sway from Queensland (I had no idea she was a contestant in the first season of Australia's Next Top Model), Pyro from Victoria, Shadow Phoenix from Japan and Esteban Molina from the USA. Top-notch stuff, PWA. Well done.

Personally, either Bishop vs Mikey or the three-way should've been the main event. I don't think there's one person at the show who didn't believe Cross vs O'Shae would've been an awesome 25-26 minute straight match. But having it as five-minute rounds killed the momentum. The crowd was into the bout on occasions but every time the crowd rose thanks to the action, the bell would sound to end the round and the crowd would deflate. The ending was very flat, too. The guys were great, but the A1GP concept needs definite tweaking, in my opinion.

Finally, I liked the Jesse v Madison build (an excellent brawl) but thought the Troy vs Eagles build was a bit underwhelming (the run-in DQ ending in Troy's match was a bit lame). Maybe an Eagles promo would've pushed the angle further (or maybe a Troy run-in after the three-way).

Also, I still have a problem with a babyface (either Mikey or O'Shae) coming to ringside with two mates against the dreaded heel. It kills the heel-vs-face dynamic. Why should we fear for the face's wellbeing when we know he has two allies outside the ring? Ring psychology anyone?

Booking missteps aside, right now, PWA is the best company in Sydney and probably one of the top three in Australia.

I don't know where UWF stands but I suspect it's a lot, lot lower on the pecking order.

PWA "Wrestlepalooza" (Minto Community Hall - 130): PWA heavyweight title: Mikey Broderick (c) b Bishop Sommers, PWA Victoria title "Lightning" Luke Watts b Troy the Boy - DQ, Blakestone defeated Jorge Del Homos, Mimic & Sorrow b Fitch Valentine & Esteban Molina, Fumanchu b Mike Valuable & Ash Riot & Mark Davis, Madison & Sway b Jessie McKay & Savannah Summers, Shadow Phoenix b Champagne Pyro & Ryan Eagles, A1GP open weight championship: Sean O’Shea b Justin Cross

PWI Top 500 2007 Tourney...for God's sake let it END!!

2008-02-15T18:00:00.007+11:00

THIS damn Gold Belt Wrestling computer is blowing smoke out the back and I think it's gonna blow soon, so let's wrap up this tourney quick-fast.

Round three led to some big upsets (surprise, surprise). Batista? Gone. Randy Orton? Gone. The Undertaker? Fuckin' gooooooone, mate!

Which led to this round four draw:

ROUND FOUR: Franky The Mobster (397) vs Shuji Kondo (225), Brent Albright (63) vs Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal (95), Mistico (3) vs Toshiaki Kawada (99), Milano Collection AT (61) vs Matt Hardy (36), Mohammed Yone (197) vs Chris Sabin (28), Akira Taue (251) vs Negro Casas (38), Ares (122) vs Erick Stevens (231), Toscano (121) vs Hiroshi Tanahashi (40), John Morrison (56) vs El Sagrado (233), Brother Ray (74) vs CM Punk (42), Ultimo Guerrero (11) vs LA Parka (43), Averno (53) vs Gregory Helms (44), Danny Doring (205) vs Mr Aguila (109), Dos Caras Jr (115) vs Chavo Guerrero Jr (46), Atlantis (79) vs Booker T (18), Mitsuharu Misawa (16) vs Hiroyoshi Tenzan (81)

OKAY. Round four saw Franky The Mobster hang in for another hard-fought win, while other more talented souls...LOST, including Kawada, CM Punk, Misawa and a bunch of others.

ROUND FIVE: Franky The Mobster (397) vs Hiroyoshi Tenzan (81), Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal (95) vs Booker T (18), Mistico (3) vs Chavo Guerrero Jr, Milano Collection AT (61) vs Mr Aguila (109), Mohammed Yone (197) vs Gregory Helms (44), Negro Casas (38) vs Ultimo Guerrero (11), Ares (122) vs Brother Ray (74), Hiroshi Tanahashi (40) vs John Morrison (56)

SOMEHOW, Franky continued to survive, landing a QF spot with ECW tag team title-holder John Morrison. X Division champ and Randy Savage knock-off Jay Lethal won and drew Mexico's Ares. Lucha legends Mistico and Negro were headed for a showdown, and in the final QF, luchadore Mr Aguila would face NOAh tag champ Mohammed Yone.

QUARTER-FINALS: Franky The Mobster (397) vs John Morrison (56), Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal (95) vs Ares (122), Mistico (3) vs Negro Casas (38), Mr Aguila (109) vs Mohammed Yone (197)

FOR the semis, it'd be the battle of tag champs, Morrison vs Yone, and another lucha war between Ares and Casas.

SEMI-FINALS: John Morrison (56) vs Mohammed Yone (197), Ares (122) vs Negro Casas (38)

AND the best 2-out-of-3 falls final boiled down to Morrison vs Ares. Er...right.

FINAL: John Morrison (56) vs Ares (122)

AND the overall winner of this longwinded, pointless tourney and the best wrestler of 2007 was and is................

John Morrison!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck me. How embarrassing.

I'm gonna throw that bloody computer in the bin.

This is Brody and Hansen. THIS is muthafuckin' wrestling!!!

2008-02-07T21:25:00.001+11:00

With thanks to wrestling.net.au. :D

This is wrestling...THIS is LuFisto!

2008-02-04T11:09:00.000+11:00

See the greatness of LuFisto at http://www.lufisto.com/.

PWI Top 500 2007 Tourney round two results:

2008-01-10T13:49:00.000+11:00

Masato Yoshino...better than Angle

SORRY I've taken so long to publish the results. Blame that old Gold Belt Wrestling computer - it really can't deal with Australian summers. *SIGH*

Anyhooo, round two was pretty interesting in parts. First off, rank outsider Franky The Mobster continued his giant-killing ways by destroying Matt Sydal.

In the first of many upsets, Kurt Angle fell to Dragon Gate's Masato Yoshino. I blame Vince Russo, personally (how the fuck did he wind up on the GBW computer?). Angle immediately started bleating about leaving wrestling and going into MMA, but no-one believed him.

Also at the losing end of things were two other top 10 rasslers, Christian Cage (felled by Ares) and Perro Aguayo Jr (pinned by Toscano).

Minoru Suzuki went down to Dos Caras Jr, who now faces another stiff battle in the shape of Triple H next round. Hunter almost stumbled against Jay Briscoe before he eventually prevailed to get the three-count. It was a bad day for the Briscoes, as Mark also lost, pinned by Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Umaga (beaten by Ricky Marvin) and Scott Steiner (submitting to Ric Flair's figure-four leglock) were shock defeats, too. Oooooh, that's gotta smart, Mr Steiner.

So here's the draw for Round 3:

Franky The Mobster (397) vs Satoshi Kojima (64)

Edge (2) vs Brent Albright (63)

Mistico (3) vs Tank Toland (195)

Yoshino (125) vs Milano Collection AT (61)

The Undertaker (5) vs Mohammed Yone (197)

Akira Taue (251) vs Ric Flair (70)

Ares (122) vs Sabu (58)

Toscano (121) vs Kensuke Sasaki (57)

Bobby Lashley (9) vs John Morrison (56)

Takeshi Morishima (10) vs Brother Ray (74)

Ultimo Guerrero (11) vs Homicide (54)

Val Venis (245) vs Averno (53)

Batista (13) vs Danny Doring (205)

Dos Caras Jr (115) vs Triple H (51)

Randy Orton (15) vs Atlantis (79)

Mitsuharu Misawa (16) vs Chris Hero (49)

Bryan Danielson (17) vs Hiroyoshi Tenzan (81)

Booker T (18) vs MVP (47)

Sting (19) vs Chavo Guerrero Jr (46)

Mr Aguila (109) vs Kenta (45)

Mr Kennedy (21) vs Gregory Helms (44)

Ricky Marvin (107) vs LA Parka (43)

Abyss (23) vs CM Punk (42)

El Sagrado (233) vs Delirious (88)

Nigel McGuinness (25) vs Hiroshi Tanahashi (40)

Erick Stevens (231) vs Rhino (39)

Takuma Sano (230) vs Negro Casas (38)

Chris Sabin (28) vs Rocky Romero (37)

Jeff Hardy (29) vs Matt Hardy (36)

Toshiaki Kawada (99) vs Jake Gymini (222)

El Hijo Del Santo (31) vs Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal (95)

Shuji Kondo (225) vs Finlay (33)

Hmmmmmm...some verrrrrrry interesting match-ups there.

NEXT TIME: The results!

A chip off the old Doc...er, block

2008-01-07T16:05:00.000+11:00

INTRODUCING Savannah Summers from Riot City Wrestling in Adelaide. She's a promising newcomer AND she's my second cousin. :D

MORE AWARDS: Aussie wrestler of the year & promotion of the year

2008-01-07T16:00:00.000+11:00

Aussie Wrestler Of The Year for 2007: Bishop Sommers

- photo courtesy of http://www.prowrestlingoz.com/

WHETHER it was serious matches or comedy bouts, Bish was money in the ring and gold on the mike. His feud with Will Phoenix in UWA didn't last anywhere near long enough for my liking while his work in PWA Elite was fantastic (especially his classic bout with Crofty The Klepto Maniac in Marrickville). His upcoming matches with Mikey Broderick and, hopefully, Ryan Eagles promise to be rocking affairs.

Tip of the hat: Blakestone (the man-monster is a force to be reckoned with in PWA Elite...his chops are things of savage beauty)...Powerhouse Theo (a quick learner and a great talent...the best thing in the AWF right now)...Sean O'Shea (PWA Elite's most promising wrestler next to Blakestone)...Mikey Lord and Alex Rudka (fromthe UWF; two of the best cruiserweights in Sydney right now)...Jag (the SA veteran consistently puts on brilliant matches and is also involved in some compelling storylines in EPW).

Aussie Promotion Of The Year
As Australia's leading wrestling journalist, I checked out most of the country's local promotions (either in person or on DVD) in 2007. In my opinion, crowds may have been down (particularly in Sydney), but the quality of wrestling has never been better. But which promotion was the BEST in 2007? How does one gauge success in a business where no-one's getting rich.

AWF brought in the most overseas talent during the year, so we should be grateful for TNT's ego. CIMA and his Dragon Gate cohorts, Sabu, Raven, X-Pac and so forth added greatly to the top of every AWF card. TNT was fine as a main eventer, although he lacks something as a babyface and should turn heel again. Sadly, AWF's undercard is generally lacking, although I respect Powerhouse Theo, Il Cognito, Mark Hilton and the Platinum Playas (as a charismatic heel unit).

IWA got TV, which was a fantastic achievement. Generally, the shows on Aurora were fine as a way of promoting the IWA, and some of the matches and angles were entertaining. The group is well-served by the likes of veteran Mark Mercedes, Tyson Gibbs, Kasey Jackson, Brett Brady and Rob Matrix. Let's face it, Angeleeka is awfully easy on the eyes. However, the booking was confusing at time and some of the people pushed on TV made no sense whatsoever. I only saw their TV shows, so maybe they toned down the in-ring action for the cameras. If not, then IWA is clearly a very old-school promotion. Still, that's a minor quibble - this group got friggin' TV! No other promotion achieved that distinction. Kudos to Mark and Ty.

UWA put on the most consistently entertaining cards from start to finish and deserved bigger crowds. The promotion needs to look at other venues 'cos Seven Hills-Toongabbie RSL is dead dead dead. The group was well-served by the likes of Will Phoenix, Troy The Boy, Salem and Devlin DeSkyes after losing of some greattalent during the year, but that spurred the group to bring along some promising newcomers like Johnny Rage and Mike Valuable (who deserves a huge push in 2008). UWA also utilised wrestlers from other promotions such as UWF, AWF and PWA Elite. The addition of The Captain, Matt Wolf and Dean Draven helped bolster the ranks, as did the return of TJ Haze and Bishop Sommers at the end of the year. They should cover the loss of Jass, Crofty and Big J (Ha! Just kidding on the last fuckwad).

UWF can be an entertaining group as it features some of the best cruiserweights in NSW. Mikey Lord, Adam Lord, Alex Rudka, Noramak, MH Cydell, etc put on some of the most exciting bouts in Oz right now. How will they cope in 2008 wrestling non-UWF regulars such as The Captain and Matt Wolf? It'll be interesting to see. Meanwhile, Morbid plays the babyface monster superbly, while heel champion Greg Stekker adds immense experience to the roster. On the negative side, the promoter pushes some questionable types in the main events (CJ Irwin, anyone?) and the UWF uses the worst fucking commentator on God's green earth (get cancer and die, you racist cunt), but this group shows a fair amount of promise heading into 2008.

PWA Elite probably has the strongest roster of workers of any Sydney promotion. Despite all my smart-arse comments about shiny belts and shiny pants, PWA has got themselves some fine wrestlers including Ryan Eagles, Mikey Broderick, Sean O'Shea and the awesome Blakestone. If the promotion has one big fault, it's the sameness of the in-ring work (which was really exposed in the recent Steve Corino Cup). A lot of the guys use the same moves, match after match. Oh, and can anyone say "too many chops"? Basically, after Blakestone's finished reducing his opponent's chest and back to jelly, it seems pointless for anyone else to use chops - they're all lame by comparison. More variety from PWA wrestlers would only add to fans' enjoyment.

I've seen glimpses of three promotions on DVD/Internet, so I'm unable to properly judge how good or bad they are. However, I CAN say that Riot City Wrestling in Adelaide looks promising if their web site's anything to go by. PWA Queensland - led by the talented Mason Childs and Ash Riot -put on one of the best weekends of wrestling in April, headlined by one of my fave US indy grapplers Chris Hero. And Wrestlerock in Melbourne used some great Victorian talent. And some of the skits they filmed for their DVDs are hilarious: Rohan Herbstreit's Rocky-style training video was a classic!

But far and away the best promotion in this country in 2007 was Adelaide's EPW. Great veteran wrestlers such as Jag, Havoc, Jayson Cooper and Damien Slater were supported by fine younger talent like Chris Vice, Robby Heart and Greg Graham. I only saw two shows involving EPW grapplers, but I have a friend (and his young daughter) who attended just about every card during the year and they confirm what I already knew: EPW cards make sense - angles were set up at one show and and flowed seamlessly to the next show. Long-term storylines were carried through until a satisfactory conclusion. Talented grapplers were pushed to the top and not held back. New stars were created, including monsters such as Wayne "The Maniac" Mattei. Media coverage was obtained and maintained throughout the year (via Network Ten sports news presenter Mark Aiston). Most importantly, EPW got great crowds to each show (600+ at times). What's not to love about EPW? Well done, fellas.

Doc Riot's Aussie matches of 2007

2007-12-19T16:45:00.000+11:00

PWA Elite's Blakestone

- photo courtesy of http://prowrestlingoz.com/

HAVING moved to Parramatta - the geographic centre of Sydney - in December 2006, I have been attending far more local wrestling shows than ever before. With that in mind, I feel I'm perfectly qualified to cast some votes for my fave matches of 2007.

In no particular order - and for sheer entertainment value just as much as in-ring action - they are:

1. CIMA vs Steve Ravenous vs TNT (AWF, Blacktown RSL, January 6): Cima was flawless in the ring and forced the other two guys to lift their wrestling to his level. A surprise ending, too - no-one expected TNT to do the job
2. Alex Rudka vs Mikey Lord (UWF, Merrylands RSL, May 27): Best cruiserweight match of the year. Not just a bunch of spots, this was a great wrestling match that included high spots
3. Masato Tanaka vs “Jag” Hartley Jackson vs Bruce “Havoc” Mills (International Assault Global Attack, Adelaide, August 10): Tanaka No. 1! Hard-core mayhem at its finest
4. Flaming Tables Match: Bruce “Havoc” Mills vs Jayson Cooper (EPW Adelaide, Clovelly Park, August 11): Havoc and Jayson take ultra-violence in Australia to a new level. Great bout, great twists, great ending to a great card
5. Bishop Sommers b Crofty (PWA Elite, Marrickville, NSW, September 8): I have not laughed so much at a match in years...and the humour was ALL intentional.
6. Mason Childs vs Ash Riot (UWA "Hallowikkid", October 28): Technically brilliant bout. I loved it, even if other fans didn't
7. Blakestone & Mark Williamson vs Maverick & Striker (PWA Elite, Marrickville, NSW, September 8): Blakestone and MS were Aussie tag team of the year, just on the strength of this one vicious squash (poor "security" guys). Mark channelled the spirit of "beach bum" Don Muraco as he munched on his Subway sandwitch throughout the contest, leaving Blakestone to do all the work. Awesome brutality mixed with even more awesome comedy
8. Blakestone vs Sean O'Shea (PWAE, Liverpool, November 30): Chop city! Blakestone and O'Shea meshed well together and brought out the best in each other
9. Ryan Eagles vs Mikey Broderick (PWAE, Liverpool, November 30): A fantastic match that maintained a strong storyline. Ryan turned heel and everything flowed nicely from the start. The upset ending, along with the man-on-valet bloodletting, really elevated this bout
10. Powerhouse Theo vs Gamma (AWF, Blacktown RSL, October 7): Theo' a new force in wrestling and probably the best thing going in AWF today. Gamma's a Dragon Gate dude who worked fast-paced comedy and really made this bout sing. He made Theo look a million dollars, but Theo didn't need that much help either

- photo courtesy of www.awfwrestling.com.au

PREVIEW: "The Triumph & Tragedy Of World Class Championship Wrestling" (out Jan. 12)

2007-12-19T15:41:00.000+11:00

BACK in the early 1980s, the hottest wrestling promotion in the US wasn’t the WWF. It was the Dallas-based World Class, headlined by the mega-popular Fritz Von Erich and his sons, David, Kerry, Kevin and, later, Mike and Chris.

The company scaled new heights of success through such innovations as the introduction of entrance music for its wrestlers, state-of-the-art camerawork, exciting matches and compelling feuds, led by the Von Erichs vs the Fabulous Freebirds, which lit a fuse under the Texas promotion.

Kevin, Kerry and David Von Erich...only Kevin is still alive today

Fritz takes on the Fabulous Freebirds

The Freebirds: Michael "PS" Hayes, Terry "Bamm Bamm" Gordy and Buddy "Jack" Roberts

But within 10 years all the brothers except Kevin were dead - as were Terry Gordy, Gino Hernandez, Bruiser Brody and others - and World Class went quickly out of business. WWE's two-disc DVD The Triumph & Tragedy Of World Class Championship Wrestling examines the reasons surrounding the company’s speedy rise and equally as speedy destruction.

OK, the documentary's quite good even with all the WWE spin and bullshit – Kevin Von Erich is an hilarious liar, by the way.

The Freebirds in 2007 are tragic to look at - Buddy Roberts uses a buzzbox in the throat to talk, Jimmy Garvin's a fat fuck and Michael Hayes looks like he's eaten half of the WWE roster. At least Hayes is still interesting when he talks.

And, frankly, they're just about the only guys from the glory days of WCCW still alive to talk about it, so it's good they're on this DVD. At least they're more honest than Kevin.

Gary Hart's good value, too, as is "Wild" Bill Irwin. Even Mick Foley drops by to throw in a few thoughts.

But the doco gets hazy with the facts (surprise, surprise) and the World Class timeline at times. It’s also loose with history when it suits the story (e.g. they pretend Michael Hayes' final babyface run in World Class in 1987 never happened. Admittedly, he'd probably want to forget about that disastrous run, too).

The documentary hints that David died of a drug overdose, but it's mainly the same kayfabe "stomach burst" bullshit we've read elsewhere. WWE can't hide it, but they let slide a lot of the bad-taste angles Fritz did to exploit the boys' deaths and illnesses. The Lance Von Erich debacle is also glossed over.

Triple H takes on the Steve Lombardi role in this DVD - he's all over it and, for some reason, takes great delight in dissing "the hard-core style...well, I don't even like to call it a style" while talking about Bruiser Brody and Abdullah The Butcher. He also says the classic lesson learned from the Von Erich story is “don’t do drugs”…I found that an ironic statement.

Overall, Triumph & Tragedy is an adequate doco. WWE and Kevin can put as much spin on the subject as they like, but it's so powerful and tragic that the truth still cuts through all the crap.

I’d recommend the DVD although I was disappointed with the extras. At least they have the full Christmas Day 1982 match between Kerry Von Erich and Ric Flair - where the Freebirds turned on Kerry - which is an absolute highlight (I’d only ever seen it before as a blurry 25th generation dub).

It’s also nice to see a classic Midnight Express (w/- Jim Cornette) vs Fantastics match (whatever became of “Little John”, I wonder?) and Brody vs Abdullah in a cage. Plus the "Jimmy Garvin and Sunshine as David Von Erich's valets for a day" skit and the music video for the Freebirds' Badstreet USA are priceless.

But there are so many other great, important matches WWE could have included that were left out. And tons more Freebirds promos, too.

Maybe they're saving them for a second volume?

This is...masked wrestling, mofos!

2007-12-19T13:58:00.000+11:00

Sam Hayne with mini-Sam Hayne (aka Hornswoggle)

Ofune

Delirious with Chikara's Men At Work

Mistico!

"Love Machine" Art Barr

BOOK REVIEW: Extremely Strange by JR Benson

2007-12-09T19:48:00.000+11:00

FIRST things first, I’m mentioned by name on page 196 of Extremely Strange, the self-published autobiography of controversial indy wrestling manager JR Benson.

With that admission out of the way, let me say that this is the second-best wrestling book I’ve ever read (just behind Mick Foley’s Have A Nice Day).

I’ve known JR and his cohort in crime Peter Hinds for 15 years – mainly through the many videos they’ve sent me. I covered their backyard promotion CCW, which was an integral part of San Francisco promotions Incredibly Strange Wrestling and Extremely Strange Wrestling during the 90s, quite a bit in my zine Betty Paginated.

Reading Extremely Strange brought back a lot of great memories of ISW and ESW, which pushed the boundaries of good taste when it came to pro-wrestling (long before ECW and WWE did). You want examples?

* Wrestlers being revived by their valet peeing on them? Check.

* Valets being raped by heels? Check.

* A wrestling commissioner played by a drooling street bum called Paul E? Check.

* Tub-full-of-used-syringes match? Check.

* Wrestlers with such names as The Abortionist, The Rapist, The Great NAMBLA and Natural Born Molester? Check.

* Ultra-violent wrestling that included moments when even the fans were in danger of being hit by thrown objects? Check.

* Major drug use by wrestlers just before a match in full view of the fans? Check.

Any perversion you can think of was probably performed on tape in front of a crowd by the CCW crew involved with ISW and ESW. And the ringleader was the drug-scoffing, extreme violence-loving bump machine JR Benson.

This book is JR’s life story, interspersed with his thoughts on the national and international wrestling scene as he grew up.

Let me state for the record that JR is one damn entertaining writer. It took me a couple of weeks to plough through 420 pages of EXTREMELY SMALL TEXT, but I still didn’t want the book to end. That’s about as big a compliment as I can give any book.

JR’s wrestling upbringing hit a chord with me right from the start. He grew up watching old-school San Francisco wrestling, while I watched Jim Barnett’s WCW in Australia with Mario Milano, King Curtis and Mark Lewin.

His thoughts on the American wrestling scene in the 80s and 90s are eerily parallel to mine. An obvious example is that I always thought NWA blew away WWF. It was clear Flair was THE MAN, not Hogan. Of course, JR benefited by the fact he actually LIVED in the USA so he got to see NWA, AWA, WWF and many other groups live, which I never did growing up.

He was also obsessed with tape trading and wrestling sheets, same as me.

Of course, where JR and I differ is that I didn’t get involved in the business (beyond reporting on it) and I didn’t get into drugs. He did and it’s chronicled in loving detail in Extremely Strange.

He may have only been an indy wrestler, but JR did far more than most indy guys could ever dream of: He booked his own promotion, wrestled and managed a bunch of talented folk on the West Coast. He got to know people like Jim Cornette at Smoky Mountain (even working a few spot shows) and also hooked up with XPW and APW (certainly more high profile than most indy groups at that time). He got in the ring against such great talents as Sabu, Al Snow and Vic Grimes, and partied with the Sandman, New Jack, Chris Jericho and more.

Other reviewers seem to get hung up about JR’s enthusiastic drug, sex and hard-core wrestling violence stories. Personally, I found them fascinating – I’ve always wondered what drove hard-core wrestlers to destroy their bodies in such painful ways and JR gave me some interesting insights into the mindset of a “garbage wrestler”.

JR’s behind-the-scenes look at the politics and bullshit surrounding small promotions like APW and XPW are truly fascinating and make this book an essential read for any true fan of the business.

Now, don’t think I’m being 100% positive here. There are faults in Extremely Strange – a prudent editor at a proper publisher could’ve trimmed out a lot of the repetitive sentences and easily edited the book down to 300 pages without losing any of the juicy, meaty stories. And as much as I agree with his anti-Bush rhetoric, I didn’t think it was relevant to a wrestling book and probably could’ve been excised, too.

However, if the book WAS edited and legaled by a publisher, then 99% of JR’s anecdotes would have been cut out due to potential lawsuits. So I guess self-publishing – with all its inherent problems – was the only option.

Some of JR’s opinions and recollections made me raise my eyebrows, too. I saw all the ISW and ESW tapes – he raves about a lot of angles and matches as being groundbreaking or much better than they truly were. Having watched those matches, I came away with a COMPLETELY different opinion. ISW/ESW was crap, but it was entertaining crap. JR was a horrible wrestler, but he took an ungodly amount of punishment and I respect him for what he put his body through for his art.

Basically, this is JR’s story and he has the right to put whatever spin he wants on his life and wrestling career. Hey, it wouldn’t be a wrestling autobiography if he didn’t.

OK. Do I recommend Extremely Strange to wrestling fans? Absolutely…if you’re open-minded enough to deal with frank, at-times offensive (for some) views on drug use, violence, sex and politics. Conservative, anti-drug Christians should avoid this book like a plague.

Everyone else will find it a blast. How much is a work and how much is real is up to you to decide.

You can buy Extremely Strange direct from JR Benson at http://www.jrbenson.com/WhatsNewbook%20release.htm.

PWA Elite: Farewell to Fozzy

2007-12-02T13:05:00.000+11:00

Eagles puts the hurt on Mikey in the main event, while ref Fozz watches closely

- all pics courtesy of www.ozwrestling.cjb.net

THERE were four good reasons to go to PWA Elite's big card last Friday night in that lovely part of Sydney known as Liverpool:
1. To see Steve Corino live in action (I've seen him twice over the years and he never fails to deliver the goods)
2. To be there for Australia's No. 1 referee Graham "Fozzy Young" Tripp's retirement show
3. To hang out with some great folk like Fozz, Ed Lock, Rodders, Nick, the Manboob Choir, Marty, etc, AND
4. To see PWA, 'cos at the moment this promotion probably has the most impressive crew of guys from top to bottom.

I was let down by Corino (who was injured and couldn't fly to Oz, I've been told), but that was the ONLY disappointment on the night.

The SCCC was probably one of the best cards I've attended this year, ranking right up there with EPW Adelaide's "Burning Bridges" (August 11) and UWA "Hallowikkid" (October 28).

It was a night of hard-hitting action, way too many chops, shiny belts and shiny pants - just what you'd expect from PWA.

It was also the most interractive wrestling show I've ever been to, which made it a helluva lotta fun on a personal level. Maybe it was the intimate atmosphere, maybe it was 'cos all the heelish shit I've yelled at PWA guys over the past few months finally came home to roost, but it seems I copped more than my fair share of verbal barbs, particularly from Ryan Eagles and Bishop Sommers. It made for an interesting night.

O'Shea clobbers Blakestone

Back to the action: big props to Blakestone vs O'Shea for their match of the night. Some people didn't like seeing the impressive Blakestone lose in the first round, but I thought it made sense on the night and I was happy to see the equally talented O'Shea progress to the semis.

I enjoyed Eagles' long-overdue heel turn in the main event and his shock loss of the Cup (and two shiny belts) to Mikey Broderick. The women's match was fun, too. What wasn't there to love about Jesse's outfit?

Mike Burr

I thought Mike Burr was the quiet achiever of the night...and he was a cool guy to talk to after the show as well. The Melbourne wrestler was a fine replacement for the absent Corino.

Jass after being eliminated from the battle royale. Off to the hospital for you, mate

There was plenty of collateral damage during the show. I was sorry to see Jass dislocate his shoulder in the battle royale, but he seemed pretty chipper later in the evening (the drugs do work, clearly). Jesse copped a nasty blow to the snout in the finishing sequence in the main event. And all the boys looked pretty beaten up and a few were limping after the event.

Ya gotta respect the amount of punishment they took to entertain us fans.

And, of course, it was a memorable show to say goodbye to Fozz in his final reffing gig. As always, he was a consummate professional and proved why he's the best there was, the best there is and the best there ever will be when it comes to the Aussie refereeing scene.

30/11 PWA Elite "Steve Corino Commemorative Cup" (Liverpool Masonic Centre - 70): FIRST ROUND: Ryan Eagles b Fumanchu, Sean O'Shea b Blakestone, Mikey Broderick b Justin Cross, Mike Burr b Adam Gambino; Jessie McKay b Madison Eagles; SEMI-FINALS: Ryan Eagles b Sean O'Shea, Mikey Broderick b Mike Burr; Bishop Sommers won the Battle Royale; SCC CUP FINAL: Mikey Broderick b Ryan Eagles to win the SCC Cup & PWA National and Heavyweight Championships

Madison vs Jesse...who's complaining?

That's gotta hurt, Fozz

2007-12-02T12:54:00.001+11:00

Pic courtesy of www.ozwrestling.cjb.net

AUSTRALIA'S greatest referee Fozzy Young gets a bloody nose while battling Kathryn Nixxxon at his final UWA show late last month.

One word, Fozz: "OUCH!"

PWI Top 500 2007 Tournament round one: Round of upsets

2007-11-30T13:43:00.000+11:00

Who woulda thought these guys would fall in the first round?

WELL, never say tournaments are predictable. There were some shocking results in round one, the biggest being the elimination of PWI's 2007 Wrestler Of The Year John Cena. Mr "Thug Life" got a taste of real thug life courtesy of Franky The Mobster who pounded on the injured ex-WWE champ until the ref called off the one-sided encounter. A fit Cena probably would've mopped the floor with Franky, but......well, them's the breaks in pro rasslin'.

HBK got his arse handed to him by a hard-hitting Akira Taue from Pro-Wrestling NOAH. Without the WWE hype machine to protect him, the "Showstopper" got stopped with an almighty boot to the fuckin' face. Say goodnight, Shawn.

More disappointing was the elimination of Samoa Joe who fell to Val Venis, of all people. A run-in by Kurt Angle helped distract Joe who fell victim to the Big Valbowski's money shot.

The other shock losers in round one included Rob Van Dam, Cibernetico, Naomichi Marufuji and AJ Styles.

This sets up an intriguing bunch of matches for the next round:
Franky The Mobster (397) vs Matt Sydal (128)
Edge (2) vs Rey Bucanero (127)

Mistico (3) vs Ron Killings (126)

Kurt Angle (4) vs Masato Yoshino (125)

The Undertaker (5) vs Super Crazy (124)

Akira Taue (251) vs Kenny Dykstra (123)

Christian Cage (7) vs Ares (122)

Perro Aguayo Jr (8) vs Toscano (121)

Bobby Lashley (9) vs Eric Young (120)

Takeshi Morishima (10) vs Keiji Muto (The Great Muta) (119)

Ultimo Guerrero (11) vs BJ Whitmer (118)

Val Venis (245) vs Marco Corleone (140)

Batista (13) vs Dick Togo (141)

Minoru Suzuki (14) vs Dos Caras Jr (115)

Randy Orton (15) vs The Boogeyman (114)

Mitsuharu Misawa (16) vs Kotaro Suzuki (113)
Bryan Danielson (17) vs Vampiro (112)

Booker T (18) vs Dragon Kid (111)

Sting (19) vs Jimmy Wang Yang (110)

Yuji Nagata (20) vs Mr. Aguila (109)

Ken Kennedy (21) vs Colt Cabana (108)

Umaga (22) vs Ricky Marvin (107)

Abyss (23) vs Hotstuff Hernandez (106)

El Sagrado (233) vs Giant Bernard (105)

Nigel McGuinness (25) vs Hector Garza (104)

Erick Stevens (231) vs Yoshinari Ogawa (103)

Takuma Sano (230) vs Austin Aries (102)

Chris Sabin (28) The Great Khali (101)

Jeff Hardy (29) vs Travis Tomko (100)

Christopher Daniels (30) vs Toshiaki Kawada (99)

El Hijo Del Santo (31) vs Brian Kendrick (98)

Shuji Kondo (225) vs Paul London (97)

Finlay (33) vs LA Mascara (161)

Jushin Liger (34) vs Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal (95)

Jake Gymini (222) vs Kevin Thorn (94)

Matt Hardy (36) vs Petey Williams (93)
Rocky Romero (37) vs Intocable (92)

Negro Casas (38) vs Shelton Benjamin (91)

Rhino (39) vs Mephisto (90)

Hiroshi Tanahashi (40) vs Chris Masters (89)

Carlito (41) vs Delirious (88)

CM Punk (42) vs Elijah Burke (87)

LA Parka (43) vs Minoru (86)

Gregory Helms (44) vs Zorro (85)

Kenta (45) vs Doug Williams (84)

Chavo Guerrero Jr (46) vs Mark Briscoe (83)

MVP (47) vs James Storm (82)

Dr Wagner Jr (48) vs Hiroyoshi Tenzan (81)

Chris Hero (49) vs Brother Devon (80)

Deuce (207) vs Atlantis (79)

Triple H (51) vs Jay Briscoe (78)

Danny Doring (205) vs William Regal (77)

Averno (53) vs Davey Richards (76)

Homicide (54) vs Alex Shelley (75)

Roderick Strong (55) vs Brother Ray (74)

John Morrison (56) vs Mark Henry (184)

Kensuke Sasaki (57) vs Jun Akiyama (72)
Sabu (58) vs Bobby Roode (71)

Scott Steiner (59) vs Ric Flair (70)

Mohammed Yone (197) vs Tiger Mask IV (69)

Milano Collection AT (61) vs LA Park (the original) (68)

Tank Toland (195) vs Claudio Castagnoli (67)

Brent Albright (63) vs Chris Harris (66)

Satoshi Kojima (64) vs Kane (65)

NEXT TIME: Round two results

And the two-ring battle royal winners are...

2007-11-29T14:08:00.000+11:00

FRANKY THE MOBSTER (Pro Wrestling Guerrilla, IWS and CZW) who threw out Matt Stryker.....and....

KC JAMES (from Ohio Valley Wrestling), who eliminated Festus Dalton.

So here's the round one draw for the PWI Top 500 2007 Tournament to determine the best wrestler of the year:

John Cena (1) vs Franky The Mobster (397)
Edge (2) vs KC James (286)
Mistico (3) vs Ozz (254)
Kurt Angle (4) vs A-1 (253)

The Undertaker (5) vs Jimmy Jacobs (252)

Shawn Michaels (6) vs Akira Taue (251)

Christian Cage (7) vs Nick Nemeth (250)
Perro Aguayo Jr (8) vs Taiyo Kea (249)

Bobby Lashley 9 vs Raven (248)

Takeshi Morishima (10) vs Derek Wylde (247)
Ultimo Guerrero (11) vs Susumu Yokosuka (246)

Samoa Joe (12) vs Val Venis (245)

Batista (13) vs El. Generico (244)

Minoru Suzuki (14) vs Johnny Jeter (243)

Randy Orton (15) vs Texano Jr (242)

Mitsuharu Misawa (16) vs Chase Stevens (241)

Bryan Danielson (17) vs Rory McAllister (240)

King Booker (18) vs Shiro Koshinaka (239)

Sting (19) vs Andy Douglas (238)

Yuji Nagata (20) vs Sangre Azteca (237)

Ken Kennedy (21) vs Mike Mondo (236)

Umaga (22) vs Latin Lover (235)

Abyss (23) vs Robbie McAllister (234)

Rob Van Dam (24) vs El Sagrado (233)

Nigel McGuinness (25) vs Shinjiro Otani (232)

Cibernetico (26) vs Erick Stevens (231)

Naomichi Marufuji (27) vs Takuma Sano (230)

Chris Sabin (28) vs Frankie Kazarian (229)

Jeff Hardy (29) vs Brazo De Plata (228)

Christopher Daniels (30) vs Daivari (227)

El Hijo Del Santo (31) vs Jesse Gymini (226)

AJ Styles (32) vs Shuji Kondo (225)

Finlay (33) vs Joey Ryan (224)

Jushin Liger (34) vs Nick Sinn (223)

The Big Show (35) vs Jake Gymini (222)

Matt Hardy (36) vs Tatsumi Fujinami (221)

Rocky Romero (37) vs Mike Knox (220)

Negro Casas (38) vs Human Tornado (219)

Rhino (39) vs Takashi Sugiura (218)

Hiroshi Tanahashi (40) vs Nunzio (217)

Carlito (41) vs Matt Bentley (216)

CM Punk (42) vs Fuerza Guerrera (215)

LA Parka (43) vs Dave Taylor (214)

Gregory Helms (44) vs Ultimo Dragon (213)

Kenta (45) vs Jamie Noble (212)

Chavo Guerrero Jr (46) vs Osamu Nishimura (211)

MVP (47) vs Johnny Devine (210)

Dr Wagner Jr (48) vs Jinsei Shinzaki (209)

Chris Hero (49) vs Apolo (208)

Senshi (Lo Ki) (50) vs Deuce (207)

Triple H (51) vs Muerte Cibernetica (206)

Cima (52) vs Danny Doring (205)

Averno (53) vs Ryo Saito (204)

Homicide (54) vs Domino (203)

Roderick Strong (55) vs Gedo (202)

John Morrison (56) vs Matt Cross (201)

Kensuke Sasaki (57) vs Olimpico (200)

Sabu (58) vs JTG (199)

Scott Steiner (59) vs Eddie Colon (198)

Charly Manson (60) vs Mohammed Yone (197)

Milano Collection AT (61) vs Brother Runt (196)

Marcus Cor Von (62) vs Tank Toland (195)

Brent Albright (63) vs Mike Kruel (194)

Satoshi Kojima (64) vs Shad Gaspard (193)
Kane (65) vs Ricky Reyes (192)

Chris Harris (66) vs Super Delfin (191)

Claudio Castagnoli (67) vs Eugene (190)

LA Park (the original) (68) vs Genki Horiguchi (189)

Tiger Mask IV (69) vs Maximo (188)

Ric Flair (70) vs Steve Corino (187)

Bobby Roode (71) vs The Sandman (186)

Jun Akiyama (72) vs Alex Koslov (185)
Black Warrior (73) vs Mark Henry (184)

Brother Ray (74) vs Pac (183)

Alex Shelley (75) vs Tommy Dreamer (182)

Davey Richards (76) vs Katsuhiko Nakajima (181)

William Regal (77) vs Kevin Steen (180)

Jay Briscoe (78) vs Santino Marella (179)

Atlantis (79) vs Don Fuji (178)

Brother Devon (80) vs Mike Quackenbush (177)

Hiroyoshi Tenzan (81) vs Felino (176)

James Storm (82) vs Damaja (175)

Mark Briscoe (83) vs Taiji Ishimori (174)

Doug Williams (84) vs Matt Striker (173)

Zorro (85) vs Cody Rhodes (172)

Minoru (86) vs Chessman (171)

Elijah Burke (87) vs Kip James (170)

Delirious (88) vs Halloween (169)

Chris Masters (89) vs BG James (168)

Mephisto (90) vs Adam Pearce (167)

Shelton Benjamin (91) vs Aaron Stevens (166)

Intocable (92) vs Lizmark Jr (165)

Petey Williams (93) vs Doug Basham (164)

Kevin Thorn (94) vs Heavy Metal (163)

Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal (95) vs Charlie Haas (162)

Shinsuke Nakamura (96) vs LA Mascara (161)

Paul London (97) vs Shawn Spears (160)

Brian Kendrick (98) vs Lance Hoyt (159)

Toshiaki Kawada (99) vs Damian 666 (158)

Travis Tomko (100) vs Hardcore Holly (157)

The Great Khali (101) vs Koji Kanemoto (156)

Austin Aries (102) vs Joey Mercury (155)

Yoshinari Ogawa (103) vs Abismo Negro (154)

Hector Garza (104) vs Paul Birchall (153)

Giant Bernard (105) vs Ephesto (152)

Hotstuff Hernandez (106) vs Kaz Hayashi (151)

Ricky Marvin (107) vs Andrew “Test” Martin (150)

Colt Cabana (108) vs Jack Evans (149)

Mr Aguila (109) vs Mike “The Miz” Mizanin (148)

Jimmy Wang Yang (110) vs Volador Jr (147)

Dragon Kid (111) vs Taka Michinoku (146)

Vampiro (112) vs Sean “X-Pac” Waltman (145)

Kotaro Suzuki (113) vs Juventud Gurrera (144)

The Boogeyman (114) vs Masao Inoue (143)

Dos Caras Jr (115) vs Jimmy Rave (142)

Manabu Nakanishi (116) vs Dick Togo (141)

Jeff Jarrett (117) vs Marco Corleone (140)

BJ Whitmer (118) vs Jerry Lynn (139)

Keiji Muto (The Great Muta) (119) vs Jay Bradley (138)

Eric Young (120) vs Lance Cade (137)

Toscano (121) vs Universo 2000 (136)

Ares (122) vs Trevor Murdoch (135)

Kenny Dykstra (123) vs Sonjay Dutt (134)

Super Crazy (124) vs Naruki Doi (133)

Masato Yoshino (125) vs Octagon (132)

Ron Killings (126) vs Togi Makabe (131)

Rey Bucanero (127) vs Gene Snitsky (130)

Matt Sydal (128) vs Shocker (129)

NEXT: First round results (including some upsets!)

PWI Top 500 2007 Tourney: BATTLE ROYALS winners

2007-11-29T13:37:00.001+11:00

THE battle royals are over and we have 21 winners going into the two-ring battle royal, to be held in the ECW Arena in Philadelphia.

HIGHLIGHTS: Kudo from Japan's DDT promotion and NWA Hawaii's Kapu tumbled out of the ring together in the eighth battle royal and landed on the floor at the same time, so BOTH will progress to the two-ring battle royal...the tenth battle royal had the best final match-up with Necro Butcher and Festus Dalton beating each other into bloody messes before Festus finally threw Necro out of the ring to win...Not to be confused with the other one, HWA's Matt Stryker snuck through in battle royal 14...Mad Man Pondo used a dropkick to eliminate Trent Acid in battle royal 16, sending many fans into shock...several wrestlers had to get rid of two men at once to win their battle royals, but Franky The Mobster went one better, disposing of Tommy Vandal, Pelle Primeau AND Ric Converse to win battle royal 17.

So here are the two-ring battle royal contestants:

Nick Mitchell, Jado, Shane Valentine, Shane Matthews, Danny Daniels, KC James, Minoru Fujita, Kudo, Kapu, Justin White, Festus Dalton, Brian Milonas, Elix Skipper, Jerry Reiner, Matt Striker, Rick Fuller, Mad Man Pondo, Franky The Mobster, Turbo, Ricochet and Chad Parham

NEXT: The battle royal winners - our final two competitors in the tourney - and the draw for the first round of the tournament proper.

RIP: Dave Sheldon (the World Class "curse" strikes again)

2007-11-28T11:50:00.000+11:00

I GOT some bad news for ya: 80s mid-carder Dave Sheldon (aka The Angel Of Death) was found dead in his home in Bedford, Texas last weekend.

If you grew up watching the wrestling in the late 80s - or reading about it in the Apter or Napolitano mags - then you came across pics of a tall, bald, evil-looking dude getting the tar beaten out of him. That was Dave.

He worked for practically everyone: Stampede, Bill Watts' UWF (where he was the Freebirds' bodyguard for a brief time), NWA/WCW (under a hood in the Russian Assassins tag team and as one of the many Black Scorpions) and, most notably, World Class.

I remember well the infamous angle shot on Christmas Day 1987 in Dallas where Angel Of Death, Terry Gordy, Buddy Roberts and Iceman Parsons attacked Fritz Von Erich, causing the old cunt to fake a heart attack to gain waning fan sympathy. It didn't work, but the foursome briefly hung out as "The Blackbirds", a poor copy of the Freebirds.

Dave won a few titles for various Texas-based promotions over the years, but was primarily a mid-carder, although he also wrestled on some big cards including World Class's Parade Of Champions in 1988 and Starrcade '88.

Angel Of Death was an ironic name: Dave was supposed to wrestle both Bruiser Brody in 1988 and Kerry von Erich in 1993, but Brody and Kerry died just before they could meet in the ring.

Dave wrestled sporadically up until 2000 before retiring.

And now he's the latest statistic in the World Class "curse" - another guy who worked for the Von Erichs who's died under the age of 50.

Eerie, sad stuff.

Hey, mofos, this is (bad masked Argentinean) wrestling!

2007-11-28T10:05:00.000+11:00

Contestants in the PWI Top 500 Tournament preliminary battle royals

2007-11-23T21:15:00.000+11:00

BATTLE ROYALS (round one):

1. MSG, New York: Big Daddy V (255), Jim Duggan (256), Sylvester Terkay (257), Shark Boy (258), Steve Lewington (259), Nick Mitchell (260), Emil Sitoci (494), Eric Fantabulous (495), Patrick Brink (496), Quicksilver (497), Brian Blade (498), Vincent Nothing (499), Andre Heart (500)
2. Pat Patterson Stadium, Rio De Janeiro: El Angel (261), Rene Dupree (262), Jado (263), Balls Mahoney (264), Oriental (265), Stevie Richards (266), Corporal Robinson (487), Jey Graham (488), Azrieal (489), Richard Phillips (490), Justin Blaze (491), Dustin Thomas (492), Joey Spector (493)

3. Hordern Pavilion, Sydney: Sylvan Grenier (267), Shannon Moore (268), Antoni Polaski (269), Shoichi Funaki (270), Brett Major (271), Harry Smith (272), Mike DiBiase (480), Shane Valentine (481), Anthony Bishop (482), Tracy Smothers (483), Mason Childs (484), Ala Hussein (485), Matt Riviera (486)

4. Some shithole, Tupelo, Mississippi: Brian Major (273), Laredo Kid (274), Rob Conway (275), Karl Anderson (276), Vito (277), Rick Steiner (278), Justyn Glory (473), JT Stahr (474), Shane Matthews (475), Rex Sterling (476), Jason Gory (477), Darin Corbin (478), Hook Bomberry (479)
5. Mid-South Coliseum, Memphis: Kassidy James (279), Kikutaro (280), Jerry Lawler (281), Rey Cometa (282), Super Dragon (283), Brad Armstrong (284), John Kermon (466), Shayne Hawke (467), Danny Daniels (468), Joey Harder (469), Ted DiBiase Jr (470), Bobby 2 Bad (471), Dick Rick (472)

6. Tokyo Dome: Takao Omori (285), KC James (286), Ryusuke Taguchi (287), Tony Mamaluke (288), Chet The Jet (289), Michael Kovac (290), Eric Draven (459), Wade Chism (460), Hentai (461), Johnny Kashmere (462), Bino Gambino (463), Kirby Mack (464), Chasyn Rance (465)
7. some fuck-off huge stadium with hardly anyone in it, San Juan, PR: Orlando Jordan (291), Minoru Fujita (292), CW Anderson (293), Gran Akuma (294), Justin LaRoche (295), El Pantera (296), Johnny Palazzo (453), Amigo Suzuki (454), Luke Hawk (455), Tony Torres (456), Ronin (457), Daniel Cross (458)

8. Wembley Stadium, London: Adam Flash (297), Scorpio (298), Chris Bosh (299), Vladimir Kozlov (300), Kudo (301), Psicosis (302), Kapu (447), Mace (448), Pierre-Carl Ouellet (449), Dylan Starr (450), Sal Rinauro (451), Zach Gowen (452)

9. That place. Y'know, THAT place...the one with the thing, remember?: Icarus (303), Scott Lost (304), Justin Credible (305), Jesse Dalton (306), Dan Rodman (307), Sicodelico Jr (308), Tank (441), Soldier Ant (442), Justin White (443), Michael Von Payton (444), Sabian (445), Shawn Cook (446)

10. Cow Palace, San Francisco: Scotty 2 Hotty (309), Necro Butcher (310), Josh Daniels (311), Festus Dalton (312), El Bronco (313), Chuck Taylor (314), Player Uno (435), Ken Steel (436), Chakal (437), Jagged (438), Darin Childs (439), Brian Ash (440)

11. Meadowlands, NJ: Brian Milonas (315), TJ Perkins (316), Romeo Roselli (317), Hallowicked (318), Brian Jennings (319), Teddy Hart (320), Go Shiozaki (429), Excalibur (430), Mike Tobin (431), Ed Gonzales (432), Shane Storm (433), Tommy End (434)
12. Houston Astrodome: Maxime Boyer (321), Drake Younger (322), Elix Skipper (323), Ace Steel (324), Jigsaw (325), Murat Bosporus (326), Toby Klein (423), Aaron Williams (424), Derek Frazier (425), Seth Shai (426), Andy Dalton (427), Kory Chavis (428)

13. The Sportatorium, Dallas: Mitch Ryder (327), Cody Hawk (328), Fergal Devitt (329), D-Ray 3000 (330), Larry Sweeney (331), Aden Chambers (332), Billy Roc (417), Danny Havoc (418), Jerry Reiner (419), Beef Wellington (420), Tony Scarpone (421), Onyx (422)

14. Seven Hills-Toongabbie RSL, Sydney: Viking (333), David Young (334), Martin Stone (335), Matt Stryker (336), Brandon Thomaselli (337), Steve Douglas (338), Scorpio Sky (411), Billy Maverick (412), Jerrelle Clark (413), Jason Blade (414), Skayde (415), Bishop (416)

15. Greensboro Coliseum, NC: Eddie Kingston (339), Devon Moore (340), Aaron Aguilera (341), Shaun Koen (342), Miyawaki (343), Sal Thomaselli (344), Scott Zenzen (405), Kimera (406), Red Anderson (407), Hiromi Horiguchi (408), Rick Fuller (409), Quinten Lee (410)

16. Barrow Town Hall, Alaska: Dave Crist (345), Jake Matthews (346), Vito Thomaselli (347), Brian Fury (348), Jake Crist (349), Madman Pondo (350), Ultramantis Black (399), Ricky Landell (400), The Great Sasuke (401), The Stro (402), Trent Acid (403), Freak Nastty (404)
17. On the set during a taping of The View: Charles Evans (351), Bad Bones (352), John Saxon (353), Pelle Primeau (354), El Blazer (355), Mascara Purpura (356), Ric Converse (393), Hangtime (394), Lince Dorando (395), Aaron Epic (396), Franky The Mobster (397), Tommy Vandal (398)
18. 20,000 leagues under the sea: Ruckus (357), Antonio Thomas (358), Ganger (359), BXB Hulk (360), Dru Onyx (361), Chris Kole (362), Alan Wasylychyn (387), Rob Eckos (388), La Sombra (389), Scot Summers (390), Ikuto Hidaka (391), Turbo (392)

19. Dark side of the moon: Shane Hagadorn (363), Kornbred (364), Sexxxy Eddy (365), Tigre Metalico (366), Danshoku Dino (367), Shiima Xion (368), Sirus LaVey (381), Damien Wayne (382), Kid Mikaze (383), Dan Paysan (384), Christian York (385), Ricochet (386)

20. Far side of crazy, Truth Or Consequences, New Mexico: Frank “The Tank” Parker (369), Chad Parham (370), Jon Moxley (371), Sterling James Keenan (372), Robert Anthony (373), Justice Pain (374), Navajo Warrior (375), Rhett Titus (376), Yoshiaki Yago (377), Josh Prohibition (378), Chance Phophet (379), Arik Cannon (380)

NEXT: The 20 battle royal winners

PWI Top 500 2007 Tournament - how it works

2007-11-22T14:33:00.000+11:00

WELL, here we go. The tourney will begin shortly - 500 of the world's best wrestlers (according to slightly dodgy Pro Wrestling Illustrated) face off to determine the best grappler of 2007.

"So how will it work, Doc?" I hear you ask. Simple. Back in the 80s, fine publications such as Gold Belt Wrestling and Wrestling Superstars would run imaginary contests. Y'know the type: "Who would win between Demolition and the Road Warriors?" "Who would win in a tag team tourney if the best teams from all the top federations were involved?" "Who would win between Sting and the Ultimate Warrior? Etc etc etc...

Some years ago, I...acquired the super-computer used to calculate the results of these fantasy match-ups. Don't ask how, it's a long story...although it does involve some compromising pictures of Ginger Snaps with Bill Apter. Other than that, my lips are sealed.

Anyway, using this super-computer, I will tabulate the results of this mega-tournament and in coming days and weeks publish the results (and some match details when the computer coughs 'em up).

Here's how it works. The top 254 wrestlers will be part of a 256-man elimination tourney.
DQs, count-outs, etc will be allowed, but no time-limit draws. There must be a victor in each match. The tourney will continue (128, 64, 32, 16, QFs, SFs and final) until there's a winner.

The final two men in the tourney will be selected from the bottom 256 grapplers in the Top 500. They will be split into groups of 12 or 13 and compete in battle royals. The winner of each battle royal will wind up in a two-ring, 20-man battle royal.

The winner in each ring will then enter the tournament proper.

Got any questions? No?

Then let's begin.

NEXT TIME: The battle royals for tournament spots No. 255 and No. 256.

This is wrestling...stables, teams, gangs and corporations (but, thankfully, no Dudes With Attitude). Part 1

2007-11-20T08:55:00.003+11:00

Jimmy Hart's First Family Of Wrestling
(Memphis, early 80s)

The best incarnation of The Four Horsemen
(NWA, late 80s)

Hot Stuff & Hyatt International (UWF, mid-80s)

PWI Top 500 2007...an idea is stirring

2007-11-18T18:57:00.000+11:00

IT'S a load of bullshit, but every year Pro Wrestling Illustrated publishes its top 500 wrestlers. And every year, the Internet smarks get upset 'cos someone got left out or someone got put higher on the list than someone "more worthy".

Sure, it's a pile of monkey crap, but it's kinda fun, too, to read (even after you've paid the outrageous $30 price tag for the mag).
For example, it was nice to see PWA Queensland's Mason Childs make the list (although, to be fair, AWF's TNT should also be on the list, too, as he's wrestled a bunch of overseas guys and also wrestled in Japan. As should IWA's Mark Mercedes, who wrestled for Muga in Japan). Like I said, it's the sorta thing marks and smarks get upset about.

Here's the list, by the way:

Mistico (No. 3)

Pro Wrestling Illustrated Top 500 - 2007

1. John Cena
2. Edge
3. Mistico
4. Kurt Angle
5. The Undertaker
6. Shawn Michaels
7. Christian Cage
8. Perro Aguayo Jr
9. Bobby Lashley
10. Takeshi Morishima
11. Ultimo Guerrero
12. Samoa Joe
13. Batista
14. Minoru Suzuki
15. Randy Orton
16. Mitsuharu Misawa
17. Bryan Danielson
18. King Booker
19. Sting
20. Yuji Nagata
21. Ken Kennedy
22. Umaga
23. Abyss
24. Rob Van Dam
25. Nigel McGuinness
26. Cibernetico
27. Naomichi Marufuji
28. Chris Sabin
29. Jeff Hardy
30. Christopher Daniels
31. El Hijo Del Santo
32. AJ Styles
33. Finlay
34. Jushin Liger
35. The Big Show
36. Matt Hardy
37. Rocky Romero
38. Negro Casas
39. Rhino
40. Hiroshi Tanahashi
41. Carlito
42. CM Punk
43. LA Parka
44. Gregory Helms
45. Kenta
46. Chavo Guerrero Jr
47. MVP
48. Dr Wagner Jr
49. Chris Hero
50. Senshi (Lo Ki)

Marcus Cor Von (No. 62)

51. Triple H
52. Cima
53. Averno
54. Homicide
55. Roderick Strong
56. John Morrison
57. Kensuke Sasaki
58. Sabu
59. Scott Steiner
60. Charly Manson
61. Milano Collection AT
62. Marcus Cor Von
63. Brent Albright
64. Satoshi Kojima
65. Kane
66. Chris Harris
67. Claudio Castagnoli
68. LA Park (the original)
69. Tiger Mask IV
70. Ric Flair
71. Bobby Roode
72. Jun Akiyama
73. Black Warrior
74. Brother Ray
75. Alex Shelley
76. Davey Richards
77. William Regal
78. Jay Briscoe
79. Atlantis
80. Brother Devon
81. Hiroyoshi Tenzan
82. James Storm
83. Mark Briscoe
84. Doug Williams
85. Zorro
86. Minoru
87. Elijah Burke
88. Delirious
89. Chris Masters
90. Mephisto
91. Shelton Benjamin
92. Intocable
93. Petey Williams
94. Kevin Thorn
95. Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal
96. Shinsuke Nakamura
97. Paul London
98. Brian Kendrick
99. Toshiaki Kawada
100. Travis Tomko

Trevor Murdoch (No. 135)

101. The Great Khali
102. Austin Aries
103. Yoshinari Ogawa
104. Hector Garza
105. Giant Bernard
106. Hotstuff Hernandez
107. Ricky Marvin
108. Colt Cabana
109. Mr Aguila
110. Jimmy Wang Yang
111. Dragon Kid
112. Vampiro
113. Kotaro Suzuki
114. The Boogeyman
115. Dos Caras Jr
116. Manabu Nakanishi
117. Jeff Jarrett
118. BJ Whitmer
119. Keiji Muto (The Great Muta)
120. Eric Young
121. Toscano
122. Ares
123. Kenny Dykstra
124. Super Crazy
125. Masato Yoshino
126. Ron Killings
127. Rey Bucanero
128. Matt Sydal
129. Shocker
130. Gene Snitsky
131. Togi Makabe
132. Octagon
133. Naruki Doi
134. Sonjay Dutt
135. Trevor Murdoch
136. Universo 2000
137. Lance Cade
138. Jay Bradley
139. Jerry Lynn
140. Marco Corleone
141. Dick Togo
142. Jimmy Rave
143. Masao Inoue
144. Juventud Gurrera
145. Sean Waltman
146. Taka Michinoku
147. Volador Jr
148. Mike “The Miz” Mizanin
149. Jack Evans
150. Andrew "Test" Martin

Mike Quackenbush (No. 177)

151. Kaz Hayashi
152. Ephesto
153. Paul Birchall
154. Abismo Negro
155. Joey Mercury
156. Koji Kanemoto
157. Hardcore Holly
158. Damian 666
159. Lance Hoyt
160. Shawn Spears
161. LA Mascara
162. Charlie Haas
163. Heavy Metal
164. Doug Basham
165. Lizmark Jr
166. Aaron Stevens
167. Adam Pearce
168. BG James
169. Halloween
170. Kip James
171. Chessman
172. Cody Rhodes
173. Matt Striker
174. Taiji Ishimori
175. Damaja
176. Felino
177. Mike Quackenbush
178. Don Fuji
179. Santino Marella
180. Kevin Steen
181. Katsuhiko Nakajima
182. Tommy Dreamer
183. Pac
184. Mark Henry
185. Alex Koslov
186. The Sandman
187. Steve Corino
188. Maximo
189. Genki Horiguchi
190. Eugene
191. Super Delfin
192. Ricky Reyes
193. Shad Gaspard
194. Mike Kruel
195. Tank Toland
196. Brother Runt
197. Mohammed Yone
198. Eddie Colon
199. JTG
200. Olimpico

Raven (No. 248)

201. Matt Cross
202. Gedo
203. Domino
204. Ryo Saito
205. Danny Doring
206. Muerte Cibernetica
207. Deuce
208. Apolo
209. Jinsei Shinzaki
210. Johnny Devine
211. Osamu Nishimura
212. Jamie Noble
213. Ultimo Dragon
214. Dave Taylor
215. Fuerza Guerrera
216. Matt Bentley
217. Nunzio
218. Takashi Sugiura
219. Human Tornado
220. Mike Knox
221. Tatsumi Fujinami
222. Jake Gymini
223. Nick Sinn
224. Joey Ryan
225. Shuji Kondo
226. Jesse Gymini
227. Daivari
228. Brazo De Plata
229. Frankie Kazarian
230. Takuma Sano
231. Erick Stevens
232. Shinjiro Otani
233. El Sagrado
234. Robbie McAllister
235. Latin Lover
236. Mike Mondo
237. Sangre Azteca
238. Andy Douglas
239. Shiro Koshinaka
240. Rory McAllister
241. Chase Stevens
242. Texano Jr
243. Johnny Jeter
244. El. Generico
245. Val Venis
246. Susumu Yokosuka
247. Derek Wylde
248. Raven
249. Taiyo Kea
250. Nick Nemeth

Super Dragon (No. 283)

251. Akira Taue
252. Jimmy Jacobs
253. A-1
254. Ozz
255. Big Daddy V
256. Jim Duggan
257. Sylvester Terkay
258. Shark Boy
259. Steve Lewington
260. Nick Mitchell
261. El Angle
262. Rene Dupree
263. Jado
264. Balls Mahoney
265. Oriental
266. Stevie Richards
267. Sylvan Grenier
268. Shannon Moore
269. Antoni Polaski
270. Shoichi Funaki
271. Brett Major
272. Harry Smith
273. Brian Major
274. Laredo Kid
275. Rob Conway
276. Karl Anderson
277. Vito
278. Rick Steiner
279. Kassidy James
280. Kikutaro
281. Jerry Lawler
282. Rey Cometa
283. Super Dragon
284. Brad Armstrong
285. Takao Omori
286. KC James
287. Ryusuke Taguchi
288. Tony Mamaluke
289. Chet the Jet
290. Michael Kovac
291. Orlando

Jordan

292. Minoru Fujita
293. CW Anderson
294. Gran Akuma
295. Justin LaRoche
296. El Pantera
297. Adam Flash
298. Scorpio
299. Chris Bosh
300. Vladimir Kozlov

Necro Butcher (No. 310)

301. Kudo
302. Psicosis
303. Icarus
304. Scott Lost
305. Justing Credible
306. Jesse Dalton
307. Dan Rodman
308. Sicodelico Jr
309. Scotty 2 Hotty
310. Necro Butcher
311. Josh Daniels
312. Festus Dalton
313. El Bronco
314. Chuck Taylor
315. Brian Milonas
316. TJ Perkins
317. Romeo Roselli
318. Hallowicked
319. Brian Jenings
320. Teddy Hart
321. Maxime Boyer
322. Drake Younger
323. Elix Skipper
324. Ace Steel
325. Jigsaw
326. Murat Bosporus
327. Mitch Ryder
328. Cody Hawk
329. Fergal Devitt
330. D-Ray 3000
331. Larry Sweeney
332. Aden Chambers
333. Viking
334. David Young
335. Martin Stone
336. Matt Stryker
337. Brandon Thomaselli
338. Steve Douglas
339. Eddie Kingston
340. Devon Moore
341. Aaron Aguilera
342. Shaun Koen
343. Miyawaki
344. Sal Thomaselli
345. Dave Crist
346. Jake Matthews
347. Vito Thomaselli
348. Brian Fury
349. Jake Crist
350. Madman Pondo

Justice Pain (No. 374)

351. Charles Evans
352. Bad Bones
353. John Saxon
354. Pelle Primeau
355. El Blazer
356. Mascara Purpura
357. Ruckus
358. Antonio Thomas
359. Ganger
360. BXB Hulk
361. Dru Onyx
362. Chris Kole
363. Shane Hagadorn
364. Kornbred
365. Sexxxy Eddy
366. Tigre Metalico
367. Danshoku Dino
368. Shiima Xion
369. Frank “The Tank” Parker
370. Chad Parham
371. Jon Moxley
372. Sterling James Keenan
373. Robert Anthony
374. Justice Pain
375. Navajo Warrior
376. Rhett Titus
377. Yoshiaki Yago
378. Josh Prohibition
379. Chance Phophet
380. Arik Cannon
381. Sirus LaVey
382. Damien Wayne
383. Kid Mikaze
384. Dan Paysan
385. Christian York
386. Ricochet
387. Alan Wasylychyn
388. Rob Eckos
389. La Sombra
390. Scot Summers
391. Ikuto Hidaka
392. Turbo
393. Ric Converse
394. Hangtime
395. Lince Dorando
396. Aaron Epic
397. Franky The Mobster
398. Tommy Vandal
399. Ultramantis Black
400. Ricky Landell

Trent Acid (No. 403)

401. The Great Sasuke
402. The Stro
403. Trent Acid
404. Freak Nastty
405. Scott Zenzen
406. Kimera
407. Red Anderson
408. Hiromi Horiguchi
409. Rick Fuller
410. Quinten Lee
411. Scorpio Sky
412. Billy Maverick
413. Jerrelle Clark
414. Jason Blade
415. Skayde
416. Bishop
417. Billy Roc
418. Danny Havoc
419. Jerry Reiner
420. Beef Wellington
421. Tony Scarpone
422. Onyx
423. Toby Klein
424. Aaron Williams
425. Derek Frazier
426. Seth Shai
427. Andy Dalton
428. Kory Chavis
429. Go Shiozaki
430. Excalibur
431. Mike Tobin
432. Ed Gonzales
433. Shane Storm
434. Tommy End
435. Player Uno
436. Ken Steel
437. Chakal
438. Jagged
439. Darin Childs
440. Brian Ash
441. Tank
442. Soldier Ant
443. Justin White
444. Michael Von Payton
445. Sabian
446. Shawn Cook
447. Kapu
448. Mace
449. Pierre-Carl Ouellet
450. Dylan Starr

Mason Childs (No. 484)

451. Sal Rinauro
452. Zach Gowen
453. Johnny Palazzo
454. Amigo Suzuki
455. Luke Hawk
456. Tony Torres
457. Ronin
458. Daniel Cross
459. Eric Draven
460. Wade Chism
461. Hentai
462. Johnny Kashmere
463. Bino Gambino
464. Kirby Mack
465. Chasyn Rance
466. John Kermon
467. Shayne Hawke
468. Danny Daniels
469. Joey Harder
470. Ted DiBiase Jr
471. Bobby 2 Bad
472. Dick Rick
473. Justyn Glory
474. JT Stahr
475. Shane Matthews
476. Rex Sterling
477. Jason Gory
478. Darin Corbin
479. Hook Bomberry
480. Mike DiBiase
481. Shane Valentine
482. Anthony Bishop
483. Tracy Smothers
484. Mason Childs
485. Ala Hussein
486. Matt Riviera
487. Corporal Robinson
488. Jey Graham
489. Azreal
490. Richard Phillips
491. Justin Blaze
492. Dustin Thomas
493. Joey Spector
494. Emil Sitoci
495. Eric Fantabulous
496. Patrick Brink
497. Quicksilver
498. Brian Blade
499. Vincent Nothing
500. Andre Heart

---------------

OK. So I've come up with my own crazy idea, mainly 'cos I'm bored. I'm gonna run an imaginary tournament to find out the best wrestler in the Top 500 for 2007.

It's smarkish (nay, more markish, really), but it's gonna be fun (for me, anyway).
More details soon on how this tourney will work.
Meanwhile, feel free to give me your tip on who's gonna win.

Fozzy's last show?

2007-11-16T10:54:00.001+11:00

PLUS Steve Corino AND Blakestone? The Doctor will be in the house that night, my friends!!!

Two very different shows...

2007-11-15T17:20:00.000+11:00

Beth Phoenix

WWE RAW (Friday, 9/11, Sydney, 20,000): Cody Rhodes & Bob Holly b Shelton Benjamin & Charlie Haas; Women's Title: Beth Phonix b Mickie James; Hacksaw Jim Duggan b Santino Marella; Rhodes & Holly b The Highlanders; World Tag Team Titles: Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch b Rhodes & Holly; Brian Kendrick b William Regal; WWE Heavyweight Title: Randy Orton b Mr Kennedy & Jeff Hardy; Street fight: HHH b Umaga

I WASN'T planning to go to the WWE Survivor Series tour when it came to Sydney last Friday, but free tickets will make you do anything, I suppose. Especially when they're free tix to the Foxtel corporate box.

Free food, free booze, free merchandise and a chance to hobnob with Kamahl? How could I refuse?

Sure, the show was mediocre - did I really need to see Bob Holly three times in one evening? - but it was cool to see Cody Rhodes and Beth Phoenix live for the first time. And it was fantastic to soak in the amazing crowd heat from the full house in attendance.

Triple H vs Umaga was a decent street fight main event. Jeff Hardy worked his arse off against an overrated Mr Kennedy and lazy world champ Randy Orton. Personally, the match of the night was Brian Kendrick vs William Regal. Regal is an entertaining dude.

I have to say, I don't think I'll ever attend another WWE card unless I can get free corporate box tix. I've been spoiled.

Devlin's big dive

UWA Hallowikkid 2007 (Sunday, 28/10, Seven Hills-Toongabbie RSL, Sydney - 120+): UWA Elite Title: CRSM b Mike Valuable, The Captain & Mexicutioner; Matt Wolf, Dean Draven & TJ Haze b Salem, Devlin DeSkyes & Blakestone; Street Fight: Johnny Rage b Troy The Boy; PWA International Title: Mason Childs b Ash Riot; PWA Double Crown (National & Heavyweight Titles): Ryan Eagles b Sean O'Shea; Aurora b Kathryn Nixxxon; UWA Ultimate Title: Will Phoenix b Bishop Sommers; TJ Haze threw out Mike Valuable to win Double Rumble.

A FEW weeks earlier I attended the best live card of 2007: UWA Hallowikkid.

From start to finish, this was an awesome card, which blew away the WWE show the following month.

A few thoughts:
* CRSM is rapidly becoming a cult babyface due to his manager The Fabulous Sebastian's antics (the free badges and face masks thrown into the crowd were a hoot). It was good to see rising star Mike Valuable and former AWF star The Captain do their thing. Mexicutioner looks like a male Aja Kong and is really only good for mid-card comedy. Still, I felt bad for him when he went down with a leg injury. Overall, a solid opening bout.
* The six-man tag started slow and I could tell everyone was waiting for Blakestone to tag in. When he did, everything stepped up a notch. This was stiff, hard-hitting fare, topped off by the move of the night, Devlin's dive from the commentators' booth on the balcony onto the guys in the ring. Awesome move. The teased dissension between Dev and tag team partner Salem was also great to behold.
* The street fight was OK. Rage shouldn't wear tassels to a street fight and Troy doesn't have the facial mannerisms to play an effective heel, but overall it was a fun match.
* Unlike some other fans, I really enjoyed Mason's technical clash with Ash. Mason reminds me of a bigger, more likable version of Ryan Eagles. This was great to watch and a nice change of pace from the previous matches.
* I love baiting Ryan - he reminds me of a smaller, less likable version of Mason Childs. His two big shiny belts and shiny pants also make him a target. Still, he and O'Shea had a great contest and I couldn't complain about the workrate.
* I'm not a fan of western women's wrestling, but I was happy to see Nixxxon start her heel turn after losing to Aurora. Kathryn makes a much better bad girl than face.
* Phoenix's title defense against Bishop was probably the match of the night (Mason vs Ash would come close) - great psychology and great moves. It's a shame the feud appears to be over now. I would've liked to have seen this thing simmer a bit further.
* The two-ring battle royal was fine, despite the stupid behaviour of fuck-faced idiot Big "But I have a small dick and a smaller brain" Jay. Once the moron had been stiffed stupid and tossed out of the ring, the match settled into an interesting contest highlighted by Valuable winning the first ring whileSalem and Dev faced off in the second ring. The fans immediately backed Dev (led by my chants, I must confess) and that was pretty cool. TJ Haze (who hadn't been eliminated after going through the bottom rope) snuck back into the ring and disposed of them both. He then made short work of Valuable to win the battle royal. It was an OK ending, but I would've preferred to see the talented Valuable get the push and go over. Just my opinion.

You know, you can go to the WWE to enjoy the big-event atmosphere and to see "the stars" live in action. Hell, that's the only reason to go, I reckon.

But if I wanna see entertaining bouts featuring wrestlers working their arses off and giving 110%, then I'll choose the UWA (or any other local promotion) every single time.

VIDEO: Freebirds debut in the WWF (c.1984)

2007-11-15T08:28:00.001+11:00

I'D READ The Fabulous Freebirds' run in the WWF was brief - so brief in fact I believed they didn't even appear in any televised matches.

I'm glad to find I was wrong.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1Z9oz0LkuE

This squash was taped in Philadelphia, PA on August 4, 1984. Babyfaces Michael Hayes, Terry Gordy and Buddy Roberts (with David Wolff and Cyndi Lauper as their managers) take on the killer team of Ron Shaw, Rene Goulet and Charlie Fulton. Mayhem ensues including a vicious, botched triple-team power bomb (back when NO-ONE else was using that move) for the finish.

I gather the Freebirds originally used Freebird by Lynard Skynard as their theme music, but WWE has since overdubbed Hayes' own crappy-but-I-still-like-it song, Badstreet USA (damn them copyright fees).

Poor drunken Freebirds - I can't believe they blew such a big opportunity working for Vince. Still, you have to admire guys who love boozing way better than they do big money and fame.

This is muthafuckin' masked wrestling (part 1)

2007-10-26T18:10:00.000+10:00

LA FAMILIA DE TINIEBLAS w ALUSHE

THE CONVICT

THE SPACE CADETS, right?

I have no idea who this guy is. :P

This is modern post-1990 wrestling (the good bits)...

2007-10-19T15:10:00.000+10:00

YEP, it's "Nature Boy" Ric Flair in the WWF (early 90s)...

Kenta Kobashi chops the shit out of Samoa Joe (Ring Of Honor)...

..."them crazy Moondogs" in Memphis...

Dead, famous wrestling dudes Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero at Wrestlemania 2004...

...three of the best: Samoa Joe, Jushin "Thunder" Liger and Bryan Danielson (Ring Of Honor)...

Waylon Mercy (Danny Spivey)...the best gimmick never to take off in the WWF.

Sabuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!

2007-10-13T21:05:00.000+10:00

TNT brings the pain to Sabu

Theo puts the hurt on Gamma

AWF OCTOBER WRESTLEFEST
Blacktown RSL, NSW (AWF, 7/10, 300+): Jay Law b Rob "The Scientist" Best;Il Cognito b Massive Q;Mark Hilton b Harry Hardshaw;Gamma b Powerhouse Theo; Super Shenron b Billy Flyswat & Kid Dynamite;AWF Tag Team Title - Surf Club b Pub Rockers;AWF Title - TNT v Sabu - no contest.

WHAT I LIKED: Sabuuuuuuuuu! (the reason why so many people were there on the night), the fact that AWF brings so many people together from different feds (I drank with dudes from AWF, PWA, IWA, UWF and UWA on the night), The Platinum Playas on the mike (these guys are gold), Il Cognito, Mark Hilton, Gamma vs Theo (match of the night...Gamma was awesome!), Bodacious Bo (the Surf Club's valet who looks uncannily like Reggie Bennett...maybe it's them meaty thighs), TNT vs Sabu (up until the ending)...

WHAT I DIDN'T LIKE: Massive Q, Kid Dynamite in the ring (way overrated), the tag title match (booooooooring!), the ending to TNT vs Sabu (a total suck-fest schmozz), the shitty collapsing tables used in the main event...

This is muthafuckin' wrestling!

2007-10-10T17:29:00.001+10:00

Necro Butcher's about to feel the wrath of Samoa Joe...

...and does.

Abby destroys Mad Man Pondo.

Abby goes for the eye (is that Sgt Slaughter?).

Bryan Danielson doesn't realise someone's ripped off the top of his head.

Nature Boy is the mutherfuckin' man.

Battle Of The Butchers

2007-10-02T14:45:00.000+10:00

A WAR for the ages: Necro Butcher vs Abdullah The Butcher!!!

Watch this titanic tussle from NWA Southwest (North Richland Hills, Texas) on April 14, 2000 at http://youtube.com/watch?v=cbAI3aBjo28.

Then read all about it - and enjoy some more of these gruesome snaps - at http://www.geocities.com/smokyrobmoore/photo4.htm.

This is...well-dressed wrestling

2007-10-01T08:56:00.001+10:00

Abdullah The Butcher cuts a fine figure

The Sheik, all pimped out

The Sheik + Abby = sartorial elegance

Santo and the muthafuckin' Blue Demon

Masked Superstar

Frank Gotch - love the top hat

Professor Boris Malenko with sons Joe and Dean

REVIEW: Beauregarde CD/DVD

2007-09-26T16:02:00.000+10:00

I READ about the re-release of the self-titled rock'n'wrestling album by the 60s and 70s grappler Beauregarde and was determined to buy it, especially as it features the original version of Testify.
According to the liner notes, this CD (plus DVD) celebrates the 40th anniversary of Beauregarde’s ring debut.
The DVD isn’t much – the highlights are a nice video clip for Testify made in the late 60s, plus some interesting photos of Beauregarde in the ring.
Sadly, the DVD wrestling footage is only of wrestlers who "inspired" Beauregarde – like Don Muraco, the Moondogs, Mr Fuji, etc. There's nothing of Beauregarde himself which is a shame, especially as he was allegedly great on the mike. It seems all the footage from Portland wrestling in the 70s was erased, so there’s sweet fuck-all of Mr B. in action. That's a damn shame.
But, let's face it, I bought this thing for the CD. So how was it? Well, it's not too shabby - the songs are a nice blend of blues rock and 60s soul, almost The Doors-like at times.

The CD features some solid tracks – I Got Something, Testify and I are probably the pick of them.

Overall, Beauregarde's a good package and of real interest to old-school rock music and wrestling fans.

Get the full story on Beauregarde at http://www.zenorecords.com/beauregarde/menu.htm.

Further info can be found at http://www.onlineworldofwrestling.com/profiles/b/beauregarde.html.

And check out this great interview with the man at http://www.infinitecore.com/superstar/index.php?threadid=50682.

Hmmm...her face looks familiar....

2007-09-25T16:30:00.000+10:00

Trinity...I thought I recognised you. She's an old favourite from People magazine - in fact, I've probably even interviewed her. Here's a couple of snaps from her centrefold feature in our October 9, 2006 issue.

BRIEF REVIEW: IWA, episode 3

2007-09-21T10:23:00.000+10:00

Trinity and Kasey Jackson get interviewed by "Percy Sludge"

ABOVE & BELOW: Kasey and Trinity in the ring

Trinity's arse = Best. Show. So. Far.

THIS is bloody wrestling! (Not-for-the-squeamish)

2007-09-19T08:38:00.000+10:00

Jos LeDuc vs Bruiser Brody (with Scott Casey as the guest referee). Watch out for that finger or you'll lose it! This is from World Class in the early 80s, I think.

Sgt Slaughter after losing his WWWF alley fight with Pat Patterson (c.1980).

Ric Flair was bleeding in the early 80s...

...and he was still bleeding in WCW in the late 90s. Come to think of it, Nature Boy's still a willing bleeder in WWE today!

Superstar Billy Graham chokes out Kevin Sullivan down in Florida.

Bruno Sammartino makes Superstar Billy Graham bleed during a classic 1970s match-up in WWWF.

Finally, here's one of those "classic" gory old wrestling mag covers from the 60s. What did parents make of this shit when they found them in their kids' room, I wonder?

End of an era

2007-09-17T22:22:00.000+10:00

Is it over for Salem (pictured) and Devlin...the second-best tag team in Australia?

16/9 Seven Hills Toongabbie RSL, Sydney (UWA - 70): UWA Elite Title: CRSM b Kid Carnage, Mike Valuable b "Not-so" Big J, UWA Tag Team Title: Dean Draven & Matt Wolf b Devlin De Skyes & Salem, UWA Elite Title: CRSM b Crofty, Bishop Sommers & Troy The Boy b Will Phoenix & Johnny Rage

I ARRIVED late for one of UWA's most eventful cards of the year, so I missed the set-up for the main event. Champ Will Phoenix brought out former Team Metro partner Bishop Sommers (welcome back, Bish! It's been way too long) as his partner for the main event "dream partner" tag match. Of course, Bish turned on Will and he and Troy The Boy beat the hell out of the champ till Troy's current nemesis, Johnny Rage, came out to even things up. Everything was set for the main event.
But first we had CRSM's defence of his Elite title. He disposed of Kid Carnage fairly easily - I only caught the end of this bout - but his always-entertaining manager (and positively evil heel commentator) Fabulous Sebastian threw out an open challenge for another match that day...much to his man's annoyance. And I love the way CRSM doesn't even attempt a Spanish accent when he talks. :D
The challenge was accepted by Crofty who cleared the ring with his barb wire 2x4 (What? No barb wire scooter?).

Showing far more than he did at last week's PWA card, Mike Valuable easily took care of Big J (mate, I think it's time you changed the gimmick. "Big J" just sounds like false advertising to me). Valuable is a real star of the future (loved his Flair bump over the turnbuckle, too).
In the big shock of the day the excellent team of Draven and Wolf downed long-time tag champs Salem and De Skyes in a great match. This is good for three reasons: 1) It shakes up the tag team division and it''ll be nice to see the ex-champs chasing the gold for a change, 2) the rematch at Hallowickid should be awesome, AND 3) The post-match dissension would suggest that a Salem-Devlin feud is on the cards down the track. And THAT will be fun to watch, too.
Props to CRSM for wrestling twice on the day. He and Crofty had a solid bout and I was sad to learn this is Crofty's last match in a while as he's moving up to Queensland. So long, big fella, I'm gonna miss the scooter.
The tag match achieved everything it was supposed to do: Rage and Troy continued their feud, I got to take some shots at Rage's 80s-inspired ring outfit (love the Marty Janetty tassels, mate), Bishop played chickenshit heel and avoided facing Will wherever possible and, at the end, Bishop scored the shock pin on the champ. This sets up the former friends to face each other in the main event at Hallowickid on Sunday, October 28 at Seven Hills Toongabbie RSL. That means we're guaranteed a minimum TWO great matches on the day.
Add the 40-man, two-ring rumble battle royal and next month's supercard promises to be hyoooooge!
I'll be there and I'll be drunk. And loud. And obnoxious.

This is lucha wrestling! (part one)

2007-09-17T15:11:00.000+10:00

This is elite?

2007-09-15T21:25:00.000+10:00

My new favourite wrestler...Mark "Sheiky" Williamson

8/9 Marrickville, NSW (PWA Elite "Victory" – 85): PWA Victorian Championship: Mikey Broderick b Fumanchu, Aurora b Jessie, Mike Valuable & Seth Rogers & Rob Foxx b Ashley Riot & Lightning Luke & Jak Arkham, Bishop Sommers b Crofty, A1GP Championship: Sean O'Shea b Champagne Pyro, Blakestone & Mark Williamson b Maverick & Striker, PWAE Heavyweight Championship: Ryan Eagles b Jass.

AFTER a week to think about it and mull things over, I can finally report to you that I enjoyed my first PWA Elite show.
The undercard was passable - better than AWF any day, sure - but not great. I liked Fumanchu's "so-not-Asian" Asian entourage. His match with Broderick went on for too long, but it was okay.
However, I hated Jessie and Mikey's poor dynamics as a face duo. Neither helped each other when they were being double-teamed during their respective bouts. What the hell was that all about?

The girls' bout was...EHH...what it was. Y'know...

Speaking of girls, the ring announcer is either the promoter's girlfriend or his sister. They're the only reasons I can think of for why she was allowed anywhere near a microphone on the night. Where was UWF's Trevor Singleton when we needed him? Nuff said.
The 6-man was a throwaway match. I didn't even realise half the dudes are UWA boys until Nick told me. Nothing wrong with it but nothing right with it either.
Ryan Eagles and his clique (these guys are BABYFACES, right?) came out for an interview which went hilariously haywire thanks to a dodgy microphone. Ryan soldiered on - restarting his interview over and over - for several minutes, when he really should have just given up. Still, it was amusing in a perverse way. Especially when he did the big angle, challenging "heckling ticket-holders" Blakestone and the always-entertaining Mark Williamson to step into the ring. This all led to the heel duo leaving and coming out later for a tag match.

The card really picked up when Crofty vs Bishop came on. I haven't laughed that hard - intentionally - during a wrestling bout in years. I feel the use of scooters in professional wrestling is sorely underrated. One of the greatest comedy matches I've ever seen.

The A1GP shoot title contest was confusing - the first five minutes was treated as a regular pro wrestling match and lost me (and most of the fans, I think). Things picked up when O'Shea and Pyro started kicking and punching the living crap out of each other. I appreciated the bout's stiffness, but it was bloody confusing.

A small point, but it needs to be made: most people in the audience (including myself) knew nothing of current PWAE storylines or even who most of the wrestlers were. Making available a free program (even just a cheap one-page photocopy) giving us a rundown of matches and the stories behind them, would've done wonders to help me keep track of what the hell was going on. Hey, Eagles, if EPW in Adelaide can do it, then so can PWAE, eh?

Blakestone and Mark Williamson are now my favourite tag team in Australia (sorry Dev & Salem). The match was fun (Mark eating Subway while Blakestone did all the work, then jumping in to score the pin was comedy gold). I also loved the punishment Blakestone dished out to the security guys/trainees after the bout. Ouch! Welcome to wrestling, boys.

The main event was pretty good - Jass is one of my favourite wrestlers in this country and he didn't disappoint in this bout. Eagles can go in the ring.
I just question the psychology: Jass is a heel and comes to the ring by himself. Eagles (with his two lovely shiny belts) comes to the ring with his two cronies O'Shea (with his lovely shiny belt) and Broderick (with his lovely shiny belt). And THEY are the faces. Eagles needs two other blokes to back him up in a fight with the heel. How fucked up is that?
Eagles won - hey, he's the booker, OK? - but Jass won over the hearts of every heel fan in attendance.

Aftewards, there was a huge clusterfuck of run-ins with everyone on the undercard brawling with each other in the ring. It was messy, pointless and over way too quick to mean anything.
It also annoyed me - everyone was willing to run in within seconds of the main event ending...but where were they when Striker and Maverick (not to mention the trainees) were getting beaten like dogs by "outsiders" Blakestone and Williamson earlier in the card? I hate that lack of internal logic.

Anyway, despite all my complaints - like I stated at the start of this report - I really DID enjoy this PWAE card.
"Elite"? I dunno about that, but it certainly got me jazzed enough to give the promotion a second try.
As long as Williamson and Blakestone are stiffing trainees on the card, then I'll be there.

Sean O'Shea juices for 85 fans. Greatness or madness? You decide

It's scooter-driven mayhem!

Invest in a microphone that works, Ryan. Or did you blow your budget on all them belts?

Nice view, Jessie. But wear a fuckin' G-string next time, OK?

Oh yeah, he's DEFINITELY Chinese

IWA on TV (episode 2)...my thoughts...

2007-09-14T14:39:00.000+10:00

Rob, remember, silence is golden

I WATCHED the second ep during the week and I have to say the matches were a big improvement. Rob Matrix vs Steve Frost was good (Frost was ferocious and I like him as a tag team with Angus McLoud), the Mark Mercedes squash over the 300-wannabe clown served its purpose and the Johnny Dundas/Tyson Gibbs encounter was pretty cool.
Hey, I saw these matches live when they were taped back in March and I'd forgotten how enjoyable the bouts were.
Now to the bells and whistles.
The commentary doesn't do it for me. Tyrone works better as a heel colour commentator while Drago would be better suited in the babyface role doing straight play-by-play. Having their roles reversed is just weird.
The backstage vignettes were okay - hokey, camp but okay.
However...Rob, Rob, ROB! Do yourself (and us) a favour and DON'T do another interview, mate. Just let your actions do the talking in the ring.

That is all.

The glorious madness of WCW

2007-09-14T14:09:00.000+10:00

Madusa vs Oklahoma (Ed Ferrara). They feuded over the WCW Cruiserweight title

THIS is possibly the greatest messageboard thread ever. I'd forgotten how insane WCW got between 1998-2001 until this post reminded me. Dave Meltzer is an unsung comic genius.

http://board.deathvalleydriver.com/index.php?showtopic=294

Sgt Stash (aka Van Hammer), part of the Misfits In Action faction

THIS is wrestling! (part one)

2007-09-13T08:09:00.000+10:00

THE LEGENDARY MATCH:

Frank Gotch vs George Hackenschmidt

- pic gratefully purloined from Death Valley Driver Video Review Message Board